The preponderance of posters using Scots dialect.

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Sixty, Aug 19, 2008.

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  1. Annoying

    0 vote(s)
  2. Endearing

  1. Sixty

    Sixty LE Moderator Book Reviewer
    1. ARRSE Cyclists and Triathletes

    To whom it may concern:

    There has been an increase in posts recently where the poster has decided that posting in (mostly Scottish) vernacular is either clever or funny. It isn’t, it’s annoying. It also doesn’t exactly portray the Jocks amongst us in the brightest of lights since, rightly or wrongly, it gives the impression that the poster is pissed (how not stereotypical eh?).

    I do appreciate that the gritty, urban patois of the street is perhaps comforting but if the culprits could actually use English, I’d be most awfully grateful.

    At the very least, could you use this thread to get it out of your systems before it’s inevitably hooped?

    I'm sure that the esteemed minds of the NAAFI will have an opinion (I'm equally sure this is likely to be Arrsholed before one can say 'Arrsehole')

  2. Ah dinny ken whit ye mean Sixty???

    Cood ye mebbe extrappal-eight.... :D

    Mea Culpa mea culpa!!! :oops:

    Due to my recent discovery of, and postings on the website "Boys of Old Bo'ness" which is done in my home town "vernacular", it does mean i won't be recognised in London EC2.

    It has become a bit of a habit I'm afraid - Sorry neebs n that eh? Ken? :D
  3. So what is the correct wording if I wish to address a fellow arser as a bawbag?

    Do I say oi scrotum sack or call him pouch for holding man hood.
  4. See you, Jimmy!


    Sorry....couldn't resist! :D
  5. I doubt most of the porridge wogs know what the Queens English is.
  6. Away an' lie in yer pish ya wassocks.
  7. "Just now" - "Feck" - "heed" - "Porridge" etc
  8. I feel constrained to point out, old boy the "Porridge Wogs" is a slang term and therefor, technically, not the Queen's English. :roll:

    Now fcuk off, you shandy-drinking cnut. :D
  9. Sixty

    Sixty LE Moderator Book Reviewer
    1. ARRSE Cyclists and Triathletes

    I believe that either 'scrotum' or 'ball-bag' are acceptable.
  10. PMSL!!!!

    66% v 33%???

    Get it riiiiiiiite up ye big man!!!!! :D

    I do know what you mean. I know how to conduct myself myself in both the written and spoken form in company.

    It's an affectation of mine when posting, but were I to read such spelling etc when posted by others; it wood dae ma tits in!!! :D :D :D
  11. Well since some porridge wogs are capable of rising to senior posts in the Cabinet, with out sounding like a Ned(chav is nowhere near to this scottish character). I wonder why so many Southern Really polite speaking chaps are so fond of using Scottish phrases to get their point across.
  12. I forgot "Big man"

    Edit: fcuk you sparky!!!
  13. I was fortunate to once be within earshot of Her Majesty and I can tell you she speaks perfect Queens English, the phrase wasn't "porridge wogs" but you get the picture.

    I'll fcuk off now.
  14. Surely (or should that be Shirley??) it should be;

    "I doubt that, most of the porridge wogs amongst us, know what the Queen's" English is?"

    I grew up speaking Libyan Arabic, did Latin, French and Spanish at school and studied Japanese (porn and language for many years) but I really do struggle with English.....

    Nae probs wi pidjun (pidgeon etc) due to my pikey heritage - caravans, candy floss n bin bags :D :D

    Edited to add; My apologies, especially to those of you who were upset at my omission of the art form that is the Waltzer...

  15. Stop being fuds the lot aye yea or I'll chib you our the hied and tan yer jaw ya bunch o fannies