The Piper's Lament

Discussion in 'Armed Forces Jokes' started by jimflint, Sep 24, 2010.

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  1. As a bagpiper, I play many gigs. Recently, I was asked by a funeral a director to play at a graveside service for a homeless ex Black Watch soldier. He had no family or friends, so the service was to be at a pauper's cemetery in Achnasheen.

    As I was not familiar with the moors, I got lost and, being a typical man, I didn't stop for directions. I finally arrived an hour late and saw the funeral was over and the hearse was nowhere in sight. There were only some diggers and crew left and they were eating lunch.

    I felt badly and apologised to the men for being late. I went to the side of the grave and looked down and the vault lid was already in place. I didn't know what else to do, so I started to play.

    The workers put down their lunches and began to gather around. I played out my heart and soul for this old soldier with no family and friends. I played like I've never played before for this homeless man. And as I played 'Amazing Grace,' the workers began to weep. They wept, I wept, we all wept together. When I finished I packed up my bagpipes and started for my car. Though my head hung low, my heart was full.

    As I opened the door to my car, I heard one of the workers say, "I never seen nothin' like that before and I've been putting in septic tanks for twenty years."

    Apparently I'm still lost....
  2. That was a masterpiece.