The only way is Essex. Is kit time for some instant sunshine.

#1
I didn't mean to, I was waiting for the whole ten yards to start and I accidentally caught the last twenty minutes of the above program. I am seriously ashamed of myself, I'm more ashamed of being part of the same nation as these talentless fuckwits. A more patriotic man than me would console themselves with the fact that they are English rather than Welsh but unfortunately I can imagine the same inane conversations done in a valleys accent.

So the solution, to quote Kenny Everret, round em up, put em in a field and bomb the baaaassssstttarrds.

Any other suggestions?
 

Trans-sane

LE
Book Reviewer
#2
I didn't mean to, I was waiting for the whole ten yards to start and I accidentally caught the last twenty minutes of the above program. I am seriously ashamed of myself, I'm more ashamed of being part of the same nation as these talentless fuckwits. A more patriotic man than me would console themselves with the fact that they are English rather than Welsh but unfortunately I can imagine the same inane conversations done in a valleys accent.

So the solution, to quote Kenny Everret, round em up, put em in a field and bomb the baaaassssstttarrds.

Any other suggestions?
Insufficient. Based on an overheard convo at work between two of the female drones I'd suggest rounding up anyone who has watched more than one episode and bombing them as well
 
#3
Insufficient. Based on an overheard convo at work between two of the female drones I'd suggest rounding up anyone who has watched more than one episode and bombing them as well
Nice work. Should have thought it myself.
 
#4
Reality TV = "entertainment" for the hard of thinking.

The tragedy is that there are a fair number of people out there that aspire to be like the attention seeking fucktards in these shite time filling programmes and actually see them as some sort of role model.

I,d bomb the bastard TV execs that swamp the airwaves with this drivel in the first place rather than the ovine zombies that watch and appear in it.
 
#9
I was 'accidently' channel hopping and I come across this..... felt like being sick into my porridge... trouble is I live in Essex.... that's why Matron keeps encouraging me to keep taking me Meds each morning......
 
#10
I think it would be a boon for any old codger nearing death. Watching a few episodes of this would convince them that they'd be far happier six feet under the surface of such a land, than walking around on the surface, sharing air with such creatures.
 
#11
Well I actually love it, came across series 1 while jetlagged at a Heathrow hotel and was hooked, everytime I get back to the UK I have to watch it, though series 2 is not so good.

I guess you lot hate it because:

It is not PC

It has no token minorities added apart from the faggot hairdresser (even he's shaggable in an emergancy)

The girls understand it is a mans World and they exist to please men

Flash cars, smart clothes, no doleys, everybody earning and grafting,

Maybe you lot should just watch shameless or one of those scouser sitcoms where everybody is on the rob.

Edited to add it even pushes personal fitness, grooming, hygiene and who can forget the wonder that was the 'bejazzeled' episode.

I'll give you it casts a dim light on educational standards, the episode where Amy thought that Guy Faukes was an American being a notable example. But that just points out how god awful schools are and is not a reflection on the stars of the show as none of them are doley wasters, it only shows how fundamentaly Evil New Labour and the teaching unions are.
 
#12
No, I dislike it because they're halfwitted, vulgarian solipsists with no taste. No reason why they shouldn't be, of course, and I hope they have a lovely time.

I just don't want to watch them having it.
 
#13
Well I actually love it, came across series 1 while jetlagged at a Heathrow hotel and was hooked, everytime I get back to the UK I have to watch it, though series 2 is not so good.

I guess you lot hate it because:

It is not PC

It has no token minorities added apart from the faggot hairdresser (even he's shaggable in an emergancy)

The girls understand it is a mans World and they exist to please men

Flash cars, smart clothes, no doleys, everybody earning and grafting,

Maybe you lot should just watch shameless or one of those scouser sitcoms where everybody is on the rob.

Edited to add it even pushes personal fitness, grooming, hygiene and who can forget the wonder that was the 'bejazzeled' episode.

I'll give you it casts a dim light on educational standards, the episode where Amy thought that Guy Faukes was an American being a notable example. But that just points out how god awful schools are and is not a reflection on the stars of the show as none of them are doley wasters, it only shows how fundamentaly Evil New Labour and the teaching unions are.
You know their names and quotes episodes.......................... Hang you head in fucking shame

I've been without the tellybox for 7 months, is this shit gonna give me incoherent monkey rage followed by a prolapse
 
#14
No, I dislike it because they're halfwitted, vulgarian solipsists with no taste. No reason why they shouldn't be, of course, and I hope they have a lovely time.

I just don't want to watch them having it.
googles online dictionary
 
#15
Edited to add it even pushes personal fitness, grooming, hygiene and who can forget the wonder that was the 'bejazzeled' episode.
Hahem, not wanting to be too pedantic but I think you will find the phrase is VEJAZZELED as in to vejazzle (decorate) ones Vagina or to ‘Bling your Beaver’ =D
 

Command_doh

LE
Book Reviewer
#16
All you haters would fuck the women in it in a heartbeat. Armchair Jihad speaks the truth, Inshallah!

It is a load of old wank though. At least I think it is. I watched about 20 minutes of an 'episode'. Is that what you call them? I hear its 'real', but there must be a script, right? Or 'guidance' from producers? There is no way I could tune into this shit week in, week out, but it made me laugh. Its a fucking documentary!
 
#17
Here's an idea -
Couldn't we just destroy essex? That would save a lot of problems, I mean really, Bid up TV makes for better viewing than "The only way is to be a dimwitted fuck head". Move the Army back to Aldershot - brings them some income back in, completely destroy essex and when anyone comes to lay flowers or some other tacky crap where essex was they could be sniped! I sign back for that!
I have to admit I did live in essex (I know I've not used a capital E, I don't feel essex deserves it) for 4 years when I was 8, my parents made me do it. They only two good things were the banger racing track - Now closed down and The fallen Miss Rogers with the big boobies my primary school teacher - But she'll be in her 50's now so I can live without here as well!

Also - To flipside the flipside, London would then have a coast and possibly beaches? Bring more tourists in, more money, raise the economy! Everyone's a winner!
 
#18
Hahem, not wanting to be too pedantic but I think you will find the phrase is VEJAZZELED as in to vejazzle (decorate) ones Vagina or to ‘Bling your Beaver’ =D
Vajazzle
 

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