On an unconnected thread about Damien Hirst, in another forum, Shortfuse has been putting his lyrical talents to best use for all of ARRSE to share. It got me wondering. I have a fair few filthy poems in my mental back catalogue and wouldn't mind collecting a few more, the filthier the better, really. Oh, and funny. They've got to be funny. One of my favourites is from the popular skit on Blaxploitation movies 'I'm gonna git you sucka'. A must for all lovers of film, if only to see an early Chris Rock in a fried chicken sketch. In one scene, Superfly, a pimp played by Antonio Fargas, wins the Pimp of the Year by reciting a poem entitled 'That Bitch better have my money' To cries of 'Shakespeare, man' he speaks "That bitch better have my money. Come rain or wind or snow That bitch better have my dough Not some, not half...... but ALL my cash. Else i'll bury my foot, dead in her ass" I also like to horrify collectors of ribald limericks by chucking the following one in There was a young man from Mauritius Who said 'That last fcuk was delicious But next time I come It'll be up your bum Coz that boil on your cu-nt looks suspicious"