The Missing Bit ...

#1
Right. This has been done in the 'charidees' section and got some response ... but not enough you tight fuckers. Gundulph and MittMayo have kindly produced a superb challenge coin for BLESMA. It is superb quality and an absolute fucking bargain at £10 ... it's more value for money than the ARRSE one coz it's bigger ... and better ... with a bit missing ... like wot BLESMA members have. And 4 quid from every coin sold goes direct to BLESMA so that they can help pay for broken people to go on jollies.

It looks like this:



Except for the back which looks like this:



It even comes in a special plastic case so you fuckers can't break it:



And a free cardboard outer box thingy:



Now, why would you want to spend your dosh on one? Well, here's a scenario for a starters;

You're wandering back from the pub, belly full of beer and kebab in hand. As you pass a piss-stinky shop doorway you hear the annoying voice asking; "Got any change mate?". On looking down there's an unshaven homeless bloke in a tatty old combat jacket with a limb or two missing holding a cardboard sign saying 'Disabled Veteran'. Now, at this stage (after confirming said spacker is not walting by asking him army stuff) you would normally feel obliged to bung him some loose change. But not with the BLESMA challenge coin in your sky rocket. Simply hold it up in a very smug 'I've already given' manner and job done. Even better, slow count to ten and if he doesn't produce his own coin (highly unlikely given they cost a tenner) the cunt owes YOU a beer. Jobs a good 'un.

Buy one. Now! Here ...

Online Shop
 
#2
Right. This has been done in the 'charidees' section and got some response ... but not enough you tight fuckers. Gundulph and MittMayo have kindly produced a superb challenge coin for BLESMA. It is superb quality and an absolute fucking bargain at £10 ... it's more value for money than the ARRSE one coz it's bigger ... and better ... with a bit missing ... like wot BLESMA members have. And 4 quid from every coin sold goes direct to BLESMA so that they can help pay for broken peole to go on jollies.

It looks like this:



Except for the back which looks like this:



It even comes in a special plastic case so you fuckers can't break it:



And a free cardboard outer box thingy:



Now, why would you want to spend your dosh on one? Well, here's a scenario for a starters;

You're wandering back from the pub, belly full of beer and kebab in hand. As you pass a piss-stinky shop doorway you hear the annoying voice asking; "Got any change mate?". On looking down there's an unshaven homeless bloke in a tatty old combat jacket with a limb or two missing holding a cardboard sign saying 'Disabled Veteran'. Now, at this stage (after confirming said spacker is not walting by asking him army stuff) you would normally feel obliged to bung him some loose change. But not with the BLESMA challenge coin in your sky rocket. Simply hold it up in a very smug 'I've already given' manner and job done. Even better, slow count to ten and if he doesn't produce his own coin (highly unlikely given they cost a tenner) the cunt owes YOU a beer. Jobs a good 'un.

Buy one. Now! Here ...

Online Shop
Darling, just for you, I shall purchase one. My satchel is going to weigh more than me if I carry on.

Does having a bit of your lungs count as a "missing bit"?
 
#3
Darling, just for you, I shall purchase one. My satchel is going to weigh more than me if I carry on.

Does have a bit of your lungs count as a "missing bit"?
Well done.

No having a bit of your lungs missing doesn't count ... I cough up bits of mine every morning.
 
#6
And here's another scenario.

You wake up in hospital one morning and some fucker has lopped off one of your legs coz you had an accident. So when the doc comes round to see you, you ask if you can have one of them falsies like wot K13 on ARRSE has got. No says the doc. We aint got no more money for falsies as we have used all the money up helping people that don't live here. So you think, right, I'm an ex squaddie so I will just join BLESMA and get them to give me a falsie like wot K13 on ARRSE has got. But when the bloke from BLESMA turns up at the hospital and says:

"Where's your coin?"

And you says:

"Wot coin?"

And he says:

"This fucking coin Nig ... el!"

And you don't have one. So he is going to just give you a lump of timber and a penknife and tell you to make your own stinking leg.

So BUY ONE.

Online Shop
 
#7
It may be alright for you, ev eryone knows that your not all there, but
I have often wondered if a BLESMA coin would be a bit waltish for some one with all the right bits still attached.
I'll buy one anyway and leave it at home with the rest of my challenge coin collection.
 
#8
And here's another scenario.

You wake up in hospital one morning and some fucker has lopped off one of your legs coz you had an accident. So when the doc comes round to see you, you ask if you can have one of them falsies like wot K13 on ARRSE has got. No says the doc. We aint got no more money for falsies as we have used all the money up helping people that don't live here. So you think, right, I'm an ex squaddie so I will just join BLESMA and get them to give me a falsie like wot K13 on ARRSE has got. But when the bloke from BLESMA turns up at the hospital and says:

"Where's your coin?"

And you says:

"Wot coin?"

And he says:

"This fucking coin Nig ... el!"

And you don't have one. So he is going to just give you a lump of timber and a penknife and tell you to make your own stinking leg.

So BUY ONE.

Online Shop
I've drank out of your leg. Heheheheheeeeeee.
 
#13
And another thing. If you know a BLESMA member who has lost both arms you can buy one of these coins as a present for them as well as treat yourself to one. I know, 20 quid is a bit of a hefty outlay for a mate. But think on; invite them to the pub once a week and make sure you challenge them just before it's time to get the beers in. They'll never beat the ten count so result ... free beer once a week!

So BUY ONE. Or TWO ...

Online Shop
 

TheIronDuke

ADC
Book Reviewer
#18
How much for the cut-out bits? In years to come they will be an heirloom for the kids so I'll keep a few.

The rest will be useful for hoying at people who are driving big Jags erratically on account of they are trying to drive them with their clutch foot missing. This is a big problem on the A9.

Cash waiting. Can swap for a Jet Ski.
 
#19
How much for the cut-out bits? In years to come they will be an heirloom for the kids so I'll keep a few.
Sluggys got a cheap cut out hole that you can purchase ... but it might frighten the kids.

The rest will be useful for hoying at people who are driving big Jags erratically on account of they are trying to drive them with their clutch foot missing. This is a big problem on the A9.
Know what you mean; that twat nearly had me in a ditch on the A9.

Cash waiting. Can swap for a Jet Ski.
But are you buying one Your Grace?
 

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