The list in my wallet .

#1
I keep a list in my wallet of people who deserve to be lamped in the pub with a blunt instrument that I believe are unlikely to get back up and kick the living daylights out of me . Top of my list is Lawrence Llewellyn Bowen because of his foppish dress sense and patronising attitude amongst other reasons . I think that one good swing with a pool cue would drop him , but that crucially , he would just stagger to his feet holding his head and whimper " What was that for ?" ( like he doesn't know ) , without coming back at me with a chair leg .
Some of the others are Jamie Oliver ( fake cockney accent and cries like a girl if anyone is rude about his wife) , Gloria Hunniford ( too nice by half ) . Hugh Grant ( nuff said ) , David Milliband etc . I could go on .
But my writing is tiny and it is a large sheet of paper and I'm not sure that it is an exhaustive list ,so who else in public life needs to be decked by a pool cue in the pub ?
 
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