The hairy muff.

[jg505]

Oh dear, I've not laughed so much in ages....this thread has proper tickled me. As for Velma in Scooby-Doo, well here she is from one of the movies.

 

[SONAR-BENDER]

I like the Cosplay thread pictures better!

 

[Grumblegrunt]

I use a ladies Razor to shave my head.
Gets it far smoother and with less cuts.

not because your a pussy then?

 

[SWJ99]

I once signed up on an internet forum with the username Mary_Hinge. Took the fcukers about 3 weeks to suss it and ban me.

 

[jg505]

I once signed up on an internet forum with the username Mary_Hinge. Took the fcukers about 3 weeks to suss it and ban me.

I believe Mary's best friend is a lady called Betty Swallocks (apologies, I know that's an old one )

 

[Old Stab]

not because your a pussy then?

No.
It's because I'm a cunt.

 

[Mike Barton]

In the 80's I tapped off with a Greek lass for a while. Proper stunner and I sometimes wonder what she looks like now as Greece is not a country that I associate with good looking older women. None of the normal body hair one associates with Mediterranean women except for a a mahossive rug. Not a case of a few spider hairs peaking out the side of the panties, more the sort of high hedgerows found along side narrow roads in places like Devon and Cornwall. The sort of foliage that could hide stray dogs and the left overs from illegal fly tipping. The first time it took a fair amount of will power not to look shocked or shout WTF.

Needed a weed whacker to find the way in but once in..... Her skills could only have been down to extensive experience, not that I was worried or cared at that moment. Pacing oneself obviously didn't translate well to Greek. At the end of an evening her growler would bear a close resemblance to a Rottweiler that had been at a bowl of porridge and I'd be hoping I could find some vitamins somewhere.

The thing about Greek/Spanish/Italian women not aging well, isn't it funny how we all take that for granted as a simple truism?

I remember my first holiday in Spain as a young lad and finding the Spanish girls on the beach and in the restaurants to be astonishingly beautiful. To my eyes, at least, experienced as I was up to that point to the pasty-faced urchins I knew from home. The Spanish girls dressed so much more stylishly too, and what with their flashing eyes and long lustrous hair, they were like goddesses compared with the girls that I had previously seen in my life.

It was an uncle, I think, who put me right with the knowing comment "Ah but look at what they grow into when they get older". We all just nodded, of course, Spanish girls would grow into fat old middens, phew I dodged a bullet there! Who'd want to end up with one of them eh? I made sure I would never get involved with those Spanish lasses (if only). No, I would restrict myself to good sensible Irish or British girls.

That was such a commonplace opinion, it clearly still is. To which I can only ask in genuine amazed curiosity, has no one seen what Irish and British girls look like when they get older?

 

[Dicky Ticker]

The thing about Greek/Spanish/Italian women not aging well, isn't it funny how we all take that for granted as a simple truism?

I remember my first holiday in Spain as a young lad and finding the Spanish girls on the beach and in the restaurants to be astonishingly beautiful. To my eyes, at least, experienced as I was up to that point to the pasty-faced urchins I knew from home. The Spanish girls dressed so much more stylishly too, and what with their flashing eyes and long lustrous hair, they were like goddesses compared with the girls that I had previously seen in my life.

It was an uncle, I think, who put me right with the knowing comment "Ah but look at what they grow into when they get older". We all just nodded, of course, Spanish girls would grow into fat old middens, phew I dodged a bullet there! Who'd want to end up with one of them eh? I made sure I would never get involved with those Spanish lasses (if only). No, I would restrict myself to good sensible Irish or British girls.

That was such a commonplace opinion, it clearly still is. To which I can only ask in genuine amazed curiosity, has no one seen what Irish and British girls look like when they get older?

Best bit of advice I ever got, if you fancy a lass then before you get serious see what her mum looks like. Chances are she will grow into the same figure

 

[SONAR-BENDER]

The thing about Greek/Spanish/Italian women not aging well, isn't it funny how we all take that for granted as a simple truism?

I remember my first holiday in Spain as a young lad and finding the Spanish girls on the beach and in the restaurants to be astonishingly beautiful. To my eyes, at least, experienced as I was up to that point to the pasty-faced urchins I knew from home. The Spanish girls dressed so much more stylishly too, and what with their flashing eyes and long lustrous hair, they were like goddesses compared with the girls that I had previously seen in my life.

It was an uncle, I think, who put me right with the knowing comment "Ah but look at what they grow into when they get older". We all just nodded, of course, Spanish girls would grow into fat old middens, phew I dodged a bullet there! Who'd want to end up with one of them eh? I made sure I would never get involved with those Spanish lasses (if only). No, I would restrict myself to good sensible Irish or British girls.

That was such a commonplace opinion, it clearly still is. To which I can only ask in genuine amazed curiosity, has no one seen what Irish and British girls look like when they get older?

I think that used to be true, however, if you wander round a typical Spanish town now you'll see a lot of very fit ladies of a certain age. You could also look for 'maduras' on the dead rodent site.........

 

[Issi]

There's nothing wrong with a hairy minge if it's attached to someone like Annette Haven. But around in my neck of the woods, it's far better for everyone involved if the lady garden is trimmed back or shorn away altogether.

So, Annette Haven didn't have a Shaven Haven?

 

[lokiuk]

I once signed up on an internet forum with the username Mary_Hinge. Took the fcukers about 3 weeks to suss it and ban me.

Admit it, it was Mumsnet wasn't it

 

[Grumblegrunt]

No.
It's because I'm a ****.

obvs we all know that but are you also a pussy

 

[History_Man]

I believe Mary's best friend is a lady called Betty Swallocks (apologies, I know that's an old one )

What about Norma Stitz?

 

[Richard Headicus]

What about Norma Stitz?

Were they as good as Erika's, of the Rowing family?

 

[Turret_Monster]

What about Norma Stitz?

Back in the early nineties some friends and I did battle against a pub quiz team named Alf Ucker. It was months before the landlord twigged and made them change it.

 

[CaptainRidiculous]

Back in the early nineties some friends and I did battle against a pub quiz team named Alf Ucker. It was months before the landlord twigged and made them change it.

Like the apocryphal racehorse, Norfolk Enchants.
Mary Hinge and Betty Swallocks were both Kenny Everett characters, as was Cupid Stunt.

 

[Dicky Ticker]

On detachment somewhere sandy back on the 90's there was a weekly quiz night. Our team went under the nome de plume "Whale Oil Beef Hooked", which sounded better in some accents than others.

 

[bobthebuilder]

Mate of mine is a serial shagger of milfs. His tinder profile describes his job as Talent Acquisition for Mill Funter

 

[Bladesman]

I prefer hairless. I had to shave my moustache off in Belize after I Velcro'd my top lip to a young local lady's bush.

Is that how the squadie porn ‘tache started?