The Guardian - boyfriend-could-not-penetrate-me

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Raven2008, Dec 5, 2011.

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  1. I have a similar problem with my dog.
     
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  2. I'd say "man up" but that appears to be the problem.
     
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  3. your dog can't penetrate you?
     
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  4. Mr Deputy, Sir!

    A mate of mine was in hysterics reading about it!
     
  5. Dear Virgin Girlfriend

    My advice to you is to dump this loser, he is obviously the size of a mouse. I suggest making your way to the nearest ARRSE crawl details for this can be found on the wonderful ARRSE website. They have plenty of advice for ladies such as you and you may be lucky enough to find one may want to treat you to some "special" intercourse. The cost of this will be full naked photos of yourself posted on the site so that the gentlemen can pass advice on best how to attract the male with a decent sized member to de-flower you.

    Yours

    Uncle ARRSE
     
  6. The "Agony Aunt" is Billy Connolly's missus I believe, perhaps it would have been funnier if he had answered the writer.

    I'd used to enjoy seeing Pamela Stephenson in "Not The Nine-O'Clock News" she had big tits, probably still does.
     
  7. I'd just advise her to wait a few years until she's a teenager
     
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  8. Horse maybe?
     
  9. She'd probably find it easier if she took her tights off. :)
     
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  10. Who Pamela Stephenson? She's a bit past that unless she's Mrs Benjamin Button :)
     
  11. Well, a trusted method is . .

    [​IMG]

    Or accept the inevitable . . and buy one of these

    [​IMG]
     
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  12. Failure to prepare is preparation for failure.....

    fucking-machine-complete-kit-sabre-saw-hammer-with-dildo.jpg
     
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  14. I note that everyone seems to be blaming the bloke here.

    More likely scenario is that she is the size of baby beluga whale and he had no flour with him at the time.