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The French

#1
What do you call 100,000 Frenchmen with their hands in the air?

The army.

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How many French troops does it take to defend Paris?

We don't know, it hasn't been tried yet.

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I joined the French army yesterday.

Was a bit confused though - the body armour only covers the back.

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Have you seen those French Army Knives?

No scissors or tweezers, just 6 corkscrews and a white flag.

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What's the first thing the French army teaches at basic training?

How to surrender in at least 10 languages.

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What's the difference between Frenchmen and toast?

You can make soldiers out of toast.
 

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