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The fastest way to lose...

#2
SeanGoesPop said:
4 stones.

Fire away :roll:
Cut off yours, and your best mate's.
 
#3
stop eating you fat cnut! failing that scoff away on your doughnuts then stick your fingers down your throat!
 
#5
Stop eating junk food you fat tw@t, motivate yourself and start beasting the pavements TWICE A DAY for at least 12 hrs each time.

BT.
 
#6
Amputate your head to start off with, then you will find you progressively lose weight over the next few weeks. And using this method you are guaranteed to keep the weight off.
 

Legs

ADC
Book Reviewer
#7
Or a sensible constructive answer...

Exercise for an hour each day. A Good CV workout. Go for a fat burner workout, not a muscle building one.

Eat sensible food, but have a varied diet. Don't get all paranoid about it, but watch your calorie intake. Burgers and chips are obviously less healthy than grilled fish, or a salad. Have the nice 'bad' stuff once in a while, but only as a treat for yourself.

Eat smaller amounts. Try using a smaller plate - it'll look like you have more on it.

Eat slower. It gives the body time to tell the mind you have a full belly.

Drink 2 litres of water per day. It helps flush out the system, and fools the belly into thinking it's full.

Cut down on beer.

Doing this I have lost 3 kilos in the last 2 weeks.
 
#8
Legs said:
Or a sensible constructive answer...

Exercise for an hour each day. A Good CV workout. Go for a fat burner workout, not a muscle building one.

Eat sensible food, but have a varied diet. Don't get all paranoid about it, but watch your calorie intake. Burgers and chips are obviously less healthy than grilled fish, or a salad. Have the nice 'bad' stuff once in a while, but only as a treat for yourself.

Eat smaller amounts. Try using a smaller plate - it'll look like you have more on it.

Eat slower. It gives the body time to tell the mind you have a full belly.

Drink 2 litres of water per day. It helps flush out the system, and fools the belly into thinking it's full.

Cut down on beer.

Doing this I have lost 3 kilos in the last 2 weeks.
Being sensible on this site?

How very dull.

Much prefer the head-loss weight-loss method.
 
#9
I managed to lose eight stone in seven months by simply sticking to rice, pasta, low fat/sugar cereals, lean meat and fish, etc.

As for exercise, run. Obviously if you're carrying a lot of weight and aren't very fit it'll be difficult for the first month or more, but just grind through it mate. Wouldn't hurt you to do plenty of sit-ups too.

Also, give up drinking, or if you absolutely have to get drunk, drink bacardi and diet coke. It's womanly, but it's only about 40 calories in a glass. A slight bit less than a pint of the black stuff eh?

Anyway, as for all the sarcastic answers to this lad's question; keep in mind that this lad is making an honest, conscious effort to lose weight, and he's looking for the right way to do it. At least he gives a **** and wants to lose the fat, yeah? He might be fat, but you're the cnuts today. :p

Anyway, good luck mate. Just keep at it. Don't expect progress overnight. :)
 
#10
Plankcore said:
Anyway, as for all the sarcastic answers to this lad's question; keep in mind that this lad is making an honest, conscious effort to lose weight, and he's looking for the right way to do it. At least he gives a * and wants to lose the fat, yeah? He might be fat, but you're the * today. :p
Yeah too true, sarcastic fkrs aren't they. Look on the bright side mate, I'm ugly and you can diet.

Arrse wouldn't be Arrse if there wasn't sarcasm involved, its what keeps morale up.

BT. :lol:
 
#11
Also consume more protien, your body consumes more energy turning protien into energy than it does turning carbs or fat into energy, also protien helps suppourt muscle growth and recovery.

Whilst you may wish to steer from weight training if you purely wish to lose weight, to avoid it all together means you would lose deiffinition as well, since your body will burn muscle tissue as well as fat. So a small amount of weight training can be helpful but don't get carried away, let cardio be the main body of your weekly exercise, also if you are going to do any weight training put in the effort, there is not point going down the gym and doing 100 reps of any exercise at 10kg, same for your cardio, somtimes i go down the gym and i see people on the tredmill walking and chatting to the person next to them, and thats their whole session, what the f***?

The thing about muscle tissue is that its 'active' tissue where as fat is dormant, whilst muscle may weight more than fat inch for inch, it also burns more calories than fat by just existing, as well as that it has a smaller mass than fat pound for pound, for example a 16 stonne strongman/bodybuilder etc .. could be toned have say a 34 inch waist ...while a 16 stonne 'fat guy' could have a 40 inch waist and wobble. Also by having a larger muscle content you can consume more calories because your body needs them to feed the muscle tissue etc. At one point before i injuried my shoulder i was consuming around 4000 cals a day just to stay at 14 st 4 lbs,

With the meals Legs is compleatly right, its about speeding up your metabolism, try to eat 5/6 meals a day, smaller meals each containing a fair portion of protien if possible, try to avoid carbs after 7pm. The theory is that your body stops storing energy as fat because its got a constant supply of energy coming in.

I know it sounds like somthing you would read off of a protien shake or slim fast advert but it works. Back in January i was a lb or two short of 18 stonne, my weight was rollercoastering between 16 and 18 stonne because i was eating crap, pissing it up and doing only weights, then as from the 3rd of Jan i just stopped, i quit smoking, only been out drinking a handful of times since, and i started doing a lot of cardio, by march i was 15 stonne, i went into my careers office and the recruiting Sgt didn't believe it, he made sure the scales were working, but i warn you, i cut my calories in more than half, i was down to about 1500 a day just stripping the fat off me, but it also left me feeling ill, i caught colds very easily. my hair became very thin and brittle and i was exhausted a lot of the time, i was lucky i found out about protien when i did.

I now sit at around 14 and a half stonne, considering im 6ft 3, my body fat is 15%, somtimes i still have 'fat days' and just eat packs of biscuits, whole tubs of ice cream etc, in its simplest form its about burning more calories than you consume.
 
#12
SeanGoesPop said:
4 stones.

Fire away :roll:
I too was a disgusting fat body in love with jelly doughnuts!! :oops:
But did the special K diet(no wah) 1-2 bowls during the day,main nosh up in evening,lay off booze total till achieved weight loss if you can and you will do what it says on the box and drop several sizes if you stick with it.All my trousers are rather too large in the old arse department now so its new cords for me. :wink:
 
#13
If your gonna eat fast food eat kebabs, they are much better for you than burgers pizza etc. Thats only if you eat the salad.
 
#14
If you're a harry chubster, buy a heart rate monitor and join a gym. Train on a cross trainer for 30-45 mins 5 times a week (yes, 5) at 70% of your maximum heart rate (MHR = 220 minus your age). Add in some high rep, low weight training (aim for three sets of twenty reps, the last set should be hard work), eat sensibly and you're done.

Once you have lost a reasonable amount of weight, you can start running without risk of lower limb injury. If you are 4 stone overwieght and you start running straight away, you won't enjoy it and you will hurt yourself (probably your knees). If you do join a gym then make use of the staff, tell them what you want and they'll sort out a program for you.
 
#15
Stop being a salad dodger and get out a run. or get down the gym.
 
#16
i was half expecting lots of sarcasm, thus the "fire away" comment ^^

In all honesty, i need to lose 2st, but i'm aiming for 4st to make my BMI good enough. Currently, 130kg @ 6'2"
 
#17
Crikey, you are a chubby chap aren't you. I wouldn't bother with any of the sensible stuff posted on this site, it's clearly written by PTIs who act as though they are 10 ranks above everyone else, purely to make up for their own deficiencies (they don't have mates - no one likes a poser).

And remember, as there are blokes who chase fat women (chubby chasers) there are also women who chase fat men, and fat blokes who chase fat blokes (fat poofers) and fat women who chase fat women (fat lezzers), so don't be sad and lonely, there is someone for everyone!
 
#18
Chuzu said:
If your gonna eat fast food eat kebabs, they are much better for you than burgers pizza etc. Thats only if you eat the salad.
and obviously Chicken Shish Kebabs are better than doner kebabs....what with them being flame grilled chicken (at least I think it's chicken).
 
#19
Warning, this post contains a serious answer...

I am currently on a diet through which i have lost 4 stone in 7 weeks. It is quite intense in that it involves a set programme and also involves councelling etc. It does look like a bit of a fad diet, but it is the councelling that makes the changes, IE you have to retrain the way you think about food and why you eat the way you do to get the way you are.

It is not rocket science, it is physically really easy. the programme is called lighterlife (www.lighterlife.co.uk). PM me for more details and my experience of it if you want.

PS: they will only let you start if you are a minimum of 3 stone overweight to begin with.

It really is easy!
 
#20
I'm on this one at the moment; on day 5 today;

Its called the 7 day fat burning diet.

The diet centres on daily consumption of easy to make fat burning soup, consisting of vegetables and powdered bullion. The more you eat of the fat burning soup, the more weight you will lose.

Do not consume any fried food, bread, flour products, sugar or sweeteners

Drink only water, unsweetened tea, black coffee, unsweetened fruit juice or when indicated skimmed milk.

Fat Burning Soup Recipe

4 large Onions
Bunch of celery
1 medium cabbage
3-5 carrots
2 large green peppers
can tomatoes
2 small cans of tomato puree
1 pk of knorr onion soup mix
seasoning pepper
curry powder
herbs
kayenne pepper
chilli powder
NO SALT

Cut into small pieces & place in large pot, cover with water & boil for 10 minutes before reducing to a simmer until the vetetables are tender, liquidize if desired store in fridge.

Monday: Eat the soup & fruit (no bananas), cantaloupe & water melon are highly recommended.
Tuesday: Eat the soup & vegetables. No fruit today
Wednesday: Eat the soup and all the fruit and vegetables you want.
Thursday: Eat the soup and bananas 5-6 bananas, 2 glasses of skimmed milk. Drink as many glasses of water as you can, the bananas and milk will replace carbohydrates, potassium, proteins and calcium.
Friday: Eat the soup at least once today, drink 6-8 glasses of water, to rince the acid from your body, you may have upto 20 oz of lean beef or skinless grilled chicken, with leafy green vegetables.
Saturday: Eat the soup at least once today, drink 4-6 glasses of water, you may have upto 3 steaks of lean beef or skinless grilled chicken, with as much leafy green vegetables you want today
Sunday: Eat the soup at least once today, eat only brown rice and vegetables (stuff yourself) drink only unsweetened fruit juice and or water

Lose between 10-15 pounds. If you lose more than 15 pounds discontinue the diet for at least 2 days, before starting again at day one.

This diet is a combination between other diets available of the net, and is used for cardiology department for over weight patients who must lose weight rapidly and safely in preparation for surgery. The diet is fast and effective, burning more calories than taking in and flushing the system of impurities

Took a while to type that out :)
 

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