The farming and smallholding thread

[Humble Tiller]

More chops and bacon for me please, and if no one else beats me to it could I have a couple of tenderloins please.

@Humble Tiller with a bit of luck you will have sold all of your new arrivals well before they are ready

Noted 06, thank you very much. That would be amazing, long way to go yet though.
I really enjoy this early bit with the pigs. It is a bit like watching a cohort of young race horses cantering in September. Everything to look forward to, and anything is possible.

 

[Oops]

Doubt it, it would be 15t/ha and a lecture about the benefits of the magnificent farce that is red tractor if he was!
Having thought about it over lunch, magnificent farce is the wrong phrase, extortion racket the krays would be proud of probably sums it up better. @HLD DMR do your grain farmers get audited like we do with 28days to rectify non conformities, and expulsion from the scam, sorry scheme and the consequent inability to trade all for no premium?

We were signed up to an assurance*.edit *Extortion scheme ( Fabbl) at the outset, however it soon became apparent if our fatstock were of a suitably high quality (they were)the buyers stood round the auction mart ring would bid daft regardless.
The icing on the cake came when we sold at auction a series of BBx heifers (non assured) over a lengthy period to one of the brothers who was the 'front' to one of the big four supermarkets' in house supply chain.
( Anyone who regularly uses the motorway network will have passed the light blue artic livestock transporters, name emblazoned down the side)
I pointed out to the elderly and incredibly experienced buyer that our cattle didn't fit his supermarket spec as they didn't have the little sticker on their passport...

"Aye I know, but they look like they do"

Oh how my neighbour laughed(not)when I informed him our beef was ending up on the same shelf as his, despite it literally costing him thousands to jump through the regulatory hoops demanded of his 'exclusive' contract.

Every year there are times when NonFA lambs are trading dearer than FA stock up here in the auctions.

Funny ol' world.

 

[Humble Tiller]

Fences cut again, cattle out. A morning spent putting things right at a very busy time. I will 101 this later. On the form there is a box to say how much the incident cost in £sd. I will put 200 acres of grazing, as I can't put cattle in this field any more. Very sad.
Nothing on the cameras, they are wise to them I think.

 

[ancienturion]

Fences cut again, cattle out. A morning spent putting things right at a very busy time. I will 101 this later. On the form there is a box to say how much the incident cost in £sd. I will put 200 acres of grazing, as I can't put cattle in this field any more. Very sad.
Nothing on the cameras, they are wise to them I think.

Bastards. Still never mind if you can't use that field any more for grazing just lace it with stretched piano wire about neck height.

 

[vvaannmmaann]

Saw my first new born lambs this am.

 

[wheelchairwarrier]

Bastards. Still never mind if you can't use that field any more for grazing just lace it with claymores

ETA fixed foc belatedly

 

[Grownup_Rafbrat]

Bastards. Still never mind if you can't use that field any more for grazing just lace it with stretched piano wire about neck height.

Land mines should help.

 

[wheel]

Fences cut again, cattle out. A morning spent putting things right at a very busy time. I will 101 this later. On the form there is a box to say how much the incident cost in £sd. I will put 200 acres of grazing, as I can't put cattle in this field any more. Very sad.
Nothing on the cameras, they are wise to them I think.

When all this lockdown shit is over I am free for a bit of wild camping op surveillance.

 

[Cloth bomber]

My best man used to shoot at an old pal of his’s shooting establishment in the wilds north of Telford. The owner had leased a considerable amount of mature woodland with deer in. He had a big lad on site who liked his own company and for a bit of helping out was allowed to have a bug out camp deep in the woods to chill in from time to time.
Anyway , they came to the notice of the deer poaching fraternity. ( they found guts and skins on a couple of occasions ( and snares I think), but it was too a big wood to easily watch so Tony the owner put the big Lad on the job.
He found where they got in. They had cut a quad width slot through a very deep hedge , on the slant, and replaced the brush so from 90 deg on you couldn’t see the opening.
He staked it out for a number of nights ( I mentioned he liked his own company) . The first night they came back he let them ( 2 men 1 quad) go in, then stretched a nylon rope tight across the gap at neck height on a quad.
( this all came out long after the event), The “ keeper” then put a couple of shots in the air and waited.
Both were “ dismounted “ by the rope and after a very thorough beating the ( slightly) smaller Gype, ( for it was they) was allowed to fvck off.
The bigger one was stripped and tied to a tree with barb for his clan to collect when they could summon the courage to look for him. The instruction was if he or his kind were seen in the wood again there would not be a next time..
True dit.

 

[Humble Tiller]

They tried to break the lock on the byway gate onto the A303, opposite Stonehenge. This area is covered by CCTV at the moment, so hopefully something will come of that.

 

[Ravers]

No caption required.

 

[load_fin]

No caption required.View attachment 554775

Sheep have but two life goals - to escape and die.

 

[Ravers]

Sheep have but two life goals - to escape and die.

That’s a goat.

They have the additional goal of “just be an all round ****.”

 

[Oops]

In @load_fin's defence.
How can you prove it a goat, it's got a feckin bag on its head?
It really wants us to believe it's a Massey Ferguson.

 

[CptDanjou]

That’s a goat.

They have the additional goal of “just be an all round ****.”

They can be very amusing doing it .

 

[anglo]

No caption required.View attachment 554775

 

[Grownup_Rafbrat]

In @load_fin's defence.
How can you prove it a goat, it's got a feckin bag on its head?
It really wants us to believe it's a Massey Ferguson.

Tail up, goat.
Tail down, sheep.

Bag on head? Goat.

 

[Tyk]

That’s a goat.

They have the additional goal of “just be an all round ****.”

Is that a goal or a genetic predisposition? I'm pretty certain it's built into their brains.

 

[Grownup_Rafbrat]

They have brains? Who knew????

Is that a goal or a genetic predisposition? I'm pretty certain it's built into their brains.

 

[olafthered]

They have brains? Who knew????

Very very small ones focussed on food, sex, and being *********.