Ortholith
LE
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LE
Fishbulb
Old Salt
Fishbulb
Old Salt
Sprog!
Ortholith
LE
1996, 1999, not much difference grandpa
D
Deleted 99482
Guest
If at first you dont succeed try again
Cecil is certainly a trier
Cecil is now getting free Bed and Breakfast
emergency-services.news
Cecil is certainly a trier
Cecil is now getting free Bed and Breakfast
A Bank Robber With Two Previous Convictions For Robbing Banks Is Sent Back To Prison; For Robbing Three More Banks - Emergency Services News
A bank robber has been sent to prison for the third time after a bank manager recognised him after he tried to rob the same bank for the third time. Cecil Stevens had already served two previous jail terms for bank robbery when he threatened a cashier at a branch of NatWest in St. Phillips […]
emergency-services.news
mufftickler
LE
An old mate of mine was on the UK Judo team and he was targeted by a group of youths around his age due to the fact that he owned a computer business.
One night he is surrounded by about eight of them.
He just threw them all over the place and carried on walking.
After the old bill got involved he was advised that the best course of action would be to move out of the area, as they were a really nasty bunch of lads.
Anyway he moved down to the west country and was set upon again walking along the towpath after a session in the pub. Only four of them this time and even though he was steaming he remembers counting them down, "One in the canal, Two in the canal, ETC."
Edit to add: He was a relative short arse, but the distance between his shoulder blades probably equalled his height.
He used to use his low center of gravity to spectacular advantage.
One night he is surrounded by about eight of them.
He just threw them all over the place and carried on walking.
After the old bill got involved he was advised that the best course of action would be to move out of the area, as they were a really nasty bunch of lads.
Anyway he moved down to the west country and was set upon again walking along the towpath after a session in the pub. Only four of them this time and even though he was steaming he remembers counting them down, "One in the canal, Two in the canal, ETC."
Edit to add: He was a relative short arse, but the distance between his shoulder blades probably equalled his height.
He used to use his low center of gravity to spectacular advantage.
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Drlligaf
LE
You muffle the screams, or merely overdo the anaesthetic?
Dentists threatened by coronavirus face-mask shortage
Some may have to "down drills" following curbs on how many they can order, the dentists' union says.www.bbc.co.uk
Might be quiet at work shortly!
Old Stab
LE
Charger for the camera has gone missing, hunting everywhere for it..
Whoooosh, a flash and a smell of sulphur as his purple robed majesty enters the room.
OS my minion, tis but a charger, go onto the bay of E and purchase another one.
Me. Hmmm that sounds like a good idea.
A few days later the charger arrives, camera is plugged into charge.
Me... Hmmmm, what is this that is wrapped around the bottom of the camera tripod, ohhhh its the original charger. Oi, Mong you ******!!
Mwahahahahahah
Whoooosh, a flash and a smell of sulphur as his purple robed majesty enters the room.
OS my minion, tis but a charger, go onto the bay of E and purchase another one.
Me. Hmmm that sounds like a good idea.
A few days later the charger arrives, camera is plugged into charge.
Me... Hmmmm, what is this that is wrapped around the bottom of the camera tripod, ohhhh its the original charger. Oi, Mong you ******!!
Mwahahahahahah
Isn't it always thus.
The amount of times I've lost something, bought a replacement then immediately find the original.
Retired bloke
ADC
"lost" a very expensive electrical test rig in a factory complex, hunted high and low. I put up wanted notices on the factory noticeboard, etc. Eventually bought a new one costing many English pounds, Monday morning turn up for work with new test kit, and there sitting on my work bench in the workshop-maintenance area, my lost test kit, with a note from the chap who found it where I last left it, in the control panel for a 1000 ton Evans press.
CrashTestDummy
MIA
Simply said, 'Bugger'.
Retired bloke
ADC
D
Deleted 99482
Guest
Speaking of losing things
at my last employers, one of the salaried mongs left his mondeo outside of the main entrance to a site with the keys in the ignition as the main gates were locked ( they could not park and walk a few yards could they )
he goes onto the site and directs a labourer to park his car for him
labourer returns what car
the nearly new Mondeo had vanished
trouble was it was a leased car, so it was reported stolen , but rather than pay for a replacement car the company elected to keep paying the lease on the basis it would turn up
it did 6 years later in the long stay car park at Heathrow
with the keys in the ignition and false plates
after numerous letters to the owner of the real plates, they worked out it was cloned and rang the police
car recovered and its ID worked out
new plates fitted by Ford Dealer and car returned
it had been gone so long the firm purchased it for small sum never realising it would come back
I had to go and collect it, first call was a valeting place to clean it out
it stayed as a pool car as the mileage was quite low after 2 years in the long stay
however the bill for parking was eye watering
at my last employers, one of the salaried mongs left his mondeo outside of the main entrance to a site with the keys in the ignition as the main gates were locked ( they could not park and walk a few yards could they )
he goes onto the site and directs a labourer to park his car for him
labourer returns what car
the nearly new Mondeo had vanished
trouble was it was a leased car, so it was reported stolen , but rather than pay for a replacement car the company elected to keep paying the lease on the basis it would turn up
it did 6 years later in the long stay car park at Heathrow
with the keys in the ignition and false plates
after numerous letters to the owner of the real plates, they worked out it was cloned and rang the police
car recovered and its ID worked out
new plates fitted by Ford Dealer and car returned
it had been gone so long the firm purchased it for small sum never realising it would come back
I had to go and collect it, first call was a valeting place to clean it out
it stayed as a pool car as the mileage was quite low after 2 years in the long stay
however the bill for parking was eye watering
