The Emperor Mongs Pronouncements

It's just a shame the feral cunt walked away rather than karking it. When he gets his licence back he'll doubtless resume driving like a twat - and may well take out Millicent Bystander in the process next time.

Immature mongs should not be allowed to drive cars with all the modern safety aids like ABS, ESP and air bags. That way only the sensible would survive to mature and grow up and get access to all the latest safety kit and the permanent drive-like-a-twat mongs would be Darwin'd out of the gene pool - preferably before they manage to reproduce.
You think he'll wait until he gets his licence back before driving again?

Ahhhh, that's so cute.
 
Lad near to us was a bit of a dick behind the wheel, just didn't care. Ban... Pffft I'll drive anyway, if plod chase me I'll drive so dangerously and outrageously they'll call it off. Job jobbed.

They chased, called it off due to the dangerous nature and outrageously stupid manoeuvres.

Drove around a corner 2 minutes after being stood down by HQ and there was the Budding Colin Mcrae embedded in the back of a parked transit van.

He now drives. A wheelchair due to lower limb injuries and brain damage.
Result you could say.
 
Lad near to us was a bit of a dick behind the wheel, just didn't care. Ban... Pffft I'll drive anyway, if plod chase me I'll drive so dangerously and outrageously they'll call it off. Job jobbed.

They chased, called it off due to the dangerous nature and outrageously stupid manoeuvres.

Drove around a corner 2 minutes after being stood down by HQ and there was the Budding Colin Mcrae embedded in the back of a parked transit van.

He now drives. A wheelchair due to lower limb injuries and brain damage.
Result you could say.
Result!
 

Joshua Slocum

LE
Book Reviewer
our ex neighbours son was a bit of a dope
smoked way too much weed, and spent too long playing computer games
he flew past one evening in his Laguna, I casually remarked to my wife, loud enough for the neighbours to hear, thats going to come back on a transporter in bits
2 hours later flashing orange lights
he skidded and hit some railings
unfortunately the CCTV system in the Chinese takeaway captured his flight path
it was has mothers car
it was well buggered, but thankfully he was wearing his seat belt
 

Kirkz

LE
I don't normally wish ill will on anybody, but any prat that drives in a manner which endangers other bods, no sympathy. The sooner they don a wooden overcoat, the safer it is for the rest of their community.
My cousin was that kind of dickhead, smoked to much weed and did all kinds of other drugs too.
One afternoon he borrowed his mates motorbike, no licence, no insurance, been drinking.
Went to fast round a bend on a country road not far from Weeton Camp and finished up embedded in a tree, broke his neck at T3 and had no feeling from his chest down, thankfully no other party involved.
Even my Mum said it was Gods way of telling him he'd done enough.
Spent the next few years feeling sorry for himself mostly in his bed, to fucking lazy to even attempt to use a wheelchair.
He passed away a few years ago, it was probably for the best.
 
In darkest Australia
"Hey, I really have a disturbing sexual fantasy itch I can't scratch"
There is a puff of purple sulphur smoke.
Behold a bald stranger in a purple nylon jumpsuit wearing a hat with corks dangling from it.
"Indeed Bruce, me old mate? Tell me about it.?"
"Alright Purple Stranger. I have this little kink I can' t scratch."
"I might know a couple of lads. I suppose you want this done before you finish moving house?"
"If possible"
"I'll see what I can do..."
 
In darkest Australia
"Hey, I really have a disturbing sexual fantasy itch I can't scratch"
There is a puff of purple sulphur smoke.
Behold a bald stranger in a purple nylon jumpsuit wearing a hat with corks dangling from it.
"Indeed Bruce, me old mate? Tell me about it.?"
"Alright Purple Stranger. I have this little kink I can' t scratch."
"I might know a couple of lads. I suppose you want this done before you finish moving house?"
"If possible"
"I'll see what I can do..."
" A lawyer for Terrence Leroy, one of the accused, said: "It was a commercial agreement to tie up and stroke a semi-naked man in his underpants with a broom. Entry was not with intent to intimidate." "

I hope he said that with a straight face, I'd have been giggling while trying to say it.
 
In darkest Australia
"Hey, I really have a disturbing sexual fantasy itch I can't scratch"
There is a puff of purple sulphur smoke.
Behold a bald stranger in a purple nylon jumpsuit wearing a hat with corks dangling from it.
"Indeed Bruce, me old mate? Tell me about it.?"
"Alright Purple Stranger. I have this little kink I can' t scratch."
"I might know a couple of lads. I suppose you want this done before you finish moving house?"
"If possible"
"I'll see what I can do..."


Its not only Tory MP's then? It rather destroys the macho image of the rugged steely jawed digger.
 

Seadog

ADC
His Purple Immenseness has been in Dorset today and he’s cleaned up.

Durdle Door beach, mobbed with people kicking the arrse out of their new freedoms.

Meanwhile, ‘thrill seekers’ think it’s a good idea to chuck themselves off the actual Durdle Door.

Jumpers ‘seriously injured’, helo evacuation required, police kettle punters to allow helos to operate, police clear beach. Roads mobbed, hours to get home, sand in arse crack. A shit day out for all but the purple one.

The Emperor in Dorset.
 

NSP

LE
His Purple Immenseness has been in Dorset today and he’s cleaned up.

Durdle Door beach, mobbed with people kicking the arrse out of their new freedoms.

Meanwhile, ‘thrill seekers’ think it’s a good idea to chuck themselves off the actual Durdle Door.

Jumpers ‘seriously injured’, helo evacuation required, police kettle punters to allow helos to operate, police clear beach. Roads mobbed, hours to get home, sand in arse crack. A shit day out for all but the purple one.

The Emperor in Dorset.
Like none of it wasn't entirely predictable...

:rolleyes:
 

ancienturion

LE
Book Reviewer
Therer's a reason it's called Tombstoning.
That seems to indicate there might, just might be a Darwin award or two.
 

NSP

LE
Plenty of social distancing going on there...

 
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