The Emperor Mongs Pronouncements

Nemesis44UK

LE
Book Reviewer
The Emperor popped back to mention that posing like a wee girl in the gents toilets would make you look real tough as well.
Gayer than a boatload of Elton Johns, that picture.

One of the comments on that story said: "PTSD."
Fuck off, it's called being pissed and not being able to handle your booze.
 

Kirkz

LE
Gayer than a boatload of Elton Johns, that picture.

One of the comments on that story said: "PTSD."
**** off, it's called being pissed and not being able to handle your booze.
Who the fuck poses for a selfie in a public bog?
Gheyer than a parade of Morris dancers at a ghey pride march, the gheyer.
 
The Emperor popped back to mention that posing like a wee girl in the gents toilets would make you look real tough as well.
I thought he was practicing dressing up as Jesus.

1571669888432.png
 
"Last train from Pancras to Ashford? Sunday night? You're on parade at Templar Barracks at 0730? Not a problem, get a few more beers and kip on the train.

What's that? The train splits at Canterbury and two carriages will end up in Hastings? Come on, sonny! You'll hear the announcements through your sleep! What could possibly go wrong?"
You were already pished if you thought you could get a train from Pancras to Ashford when Templar Barracks was still open. It's been a housing estate for years...

Sent from my S41 using Tapatalk
 

NSP

LE
The Emperor popped back to mention that posing like a wee girl in the gents toilets would make you look real tough as well.
His Eminence probably had a hand in him choosing to appear in court so casually attired, too.
 

Joshua Slocum

LE
Book Reviewer
The emperor has been on home ground with this one
I think he shows a deep dislike of hipsters
Lad is living the life in Bali
well of course the locals dont wear a helmet, but then they dont go very fast
So the Purple one whispers into his ear , thou shall not wear a bone dome lest it affects thy wonderful abundance of cornrows and pirate hair, thou is also as good as Valentino Rossi ( who does wear a helmet)
so the idiot hits a wall, and his family and friends are now raising vast sums of money to treat him
the insurer's invoke the emperors clause ( no helmet no cover simples )




1571727931476.png
 
well of course the locals dont wear a helmet, but then they dont go very fast
Actually almost all of them do, same in Jakarta. If you get one of the scooter taxis they have helmets for passengers.
 

Tuffty

War Hero
How about, Referee a World Cup Rugby Quater FInal match, send off a French guy for elbowing a Wales player. Then have your picture taken with Welsh Fans and your elbow in one of their faces. In no way would that effect your chances of refereeing a Semi Final or Final
 

Joker62

ADC
Book Reviewer
The emperor has been on home ground with this one
I think he shows a deep dislike of hipsters
Lad is living the life in Bali
well of course the locals dont wear a helmet, but then they dont go very fast
So the Purple one whispers into his ear , thou shall not wear a bone dome lest it affects thy wonderful abundance of cornrows and pirate hair, thou is also as good as Valentino Rossi ( who does wear a helmet)
so the idiot hits a wall, and his family and friends are now raising vast sums of money to treat him
the insurer's invoke the emperors clause ( no helmet no cover simples )




View attachment 424589
I was tempted to write "get some bloody travel insurance next time", but the thought "meh".
 

Joshua Slocum

LE
Book Reviewer
Aha vain young man looking for likes on you tube
why not strap a go pro to the outside of your RS8 wally wagen , drive like a twat on a narrow winding road in Derbyshire?? no way will the rozzers be able to nick you for speeding

MWAAAAAHHHHAAAA





From his you tube site

DescriptionI film and edit non Click bait YouTube videos during my spare time, maybe one day it will become a full time thing :) Some people call me Mr BMW, in reality I'm not biased towards any brand, if I had the money I would own a Porsche GT3 Touring. I currently run a London based Chauffeur company, I use a 2019 BMW 740LD M Sport xDrive for that, my daily car is a BMW M2 Competition. I love mountain biking and like to keep myself reasonably fit.... My Instagram account is @joeachilles If you like my videos please give me thumbs up & subscribe for more. Cheers

ye cheers wanker
hows the chauffeuring going with all those points ????
best pop over to see @earth for some driving tips

1571733846900.png
 

Cutaway

LE
Kit Reviewer
Aha vain young man looking for likes on you tube
why not strap a go pro to the outside of your RS8 wally wagen , drive like a twat on a narrow winding road in Derbyshire?? no way will the rozzers be able to nick you for speeding

MWAAAAAHHHHAAAA





From his you tube site

DescriptionI film and edit non Click bait YouTube videos during my spare time, maybe one day it will become a full time thing :) Some people call me Mr BMW, in reality I'm not biased towards any brand, if I had the money I would own a Porsche GT3 Touring. I currently run a London based Chauffeur company, I use a 2019 BMW 740LD M Sport xDrive for that, my daily car is a BMW M2 Competition. I love mountain biking and like to keep myself reasonably fit.... My Instagram account is @joeachilles If you like my videos please give me thumbs up & subscribe for more. Cheers

ye cheers ******
hows the chauffeuring going with all those points ????
best pop over to see @earth for some driving tips

View attachment 424602
"Joe Achilles."
 

Cutaway

LE
Kit Reviewer
Magera of Leicester USA said:
bring back national service. that would teach him discipline and respect. oh wait...
 
Cockroaches nesting in your garden?
Pour some petrol down the hole and light the match.
What could possibly go wrong?

Do not try this at home! Bungling gardener tries to kill cockroaches by setting fire to their nest – but blows up his lawn instead

Gardener tries to kill cockroaches but blows up his lawn instead

View attachment 424679

Video is on the link
Ah the wonders of fuel/air explosives, just a tad more destructive than most people would imagine.
This quote from your link is amusing:
"He revealed that he is still clearing up the mess and will need to replant his lawn, but added the roach infestation has now been solved."
Well if he didn't actually kill them all then they're all suffering from PTSD and stone deaf.
Explosives seem to be a speciality of EM. Around 10 years ago in Bielefeld the wife of some squaddie tried an insurance fraud with around 10 lts of petrol in her flat, the end result was instead of a nice little fire she along with all the doors and windows got blown out of the flat and fire brigade experts announced that the entire block was unsafe to live in. Not that she had any worries about accomodation for the next 7 years.
 
Ah the wonders of fuel/air explosives, just a tad more destructive than most people would imagine.
This quote from your link is amusing:
"He revealed that he is still clearing up the mess and will need to replant his lawn, but added the roach infestation has now been solved."
Well if he didn't actually kill them all then they're all suffering from PTSD and stone deaf.
Explosives seem to be a speciality of EM. Around 10 years ago in Bielefeld the wife of some squaddie tried an insurance fraud with around 10 lts of petrol in her flat, the end result was instead of a nice little fire she along with all the doors and windows got blown out of the flat and fire brigade experts announced that the entire block was unsafe to live in. Not that she had any worries about accomodation for the next 7 years.
Got a link I can google and giggle at?
Whereabouts in Bielefeld?
 

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