The Emperor Mongs Pronouncements

OH, FFS!

A toddler has fallen to her death after slipping out of her grandfather's arms on a cruise ship which was docked in Puerto Rico.
The 19-month-old girl from Indiana plunged from the Royal Caribbean vessel in San Juan on Sunday afternoon.
Her grandfather is believed to have slipped and fallen while holding the toddler by a window on the 11th deck of the Freedom of the Seas ship.

Indiana toddler falls to death from 11th deck of a Royal Caribbean cruise ship docked in Puerto Rico | Daily Mail Online
 

ancienturion

LE
Book Reviewer
OH, FFS!

A toddler has fallen to her death after slipping out of her grandfather's arms on a cruise ship which was docked in Puerto Rico.
The 19-month-old girl from Indiana plunged from the Royal Caribbean vessel in San Juan on Sunday afternoon.
Her grandfather is believed to have slipped and fallen while holding the toddler by a window on the 11th deck of the Freedom of the Seas ship.

Indiana toddler falls to death from 11th deck of a Royal Caribbean cruise ship docked in Puerto Rico | Daily Mail Online
It will have one big advantage in that I doubt that family will ever have big get-togethers again.
 
Emperor Mong [PBUH] is now a navigator with the SwissAir Force display team:

Swiss jet display team flies over wrong festival

Patrouille Suisse: Fighter jet display team fly-by misses town

A Swiss aerial display team has performed a fly-by over the wrong town, surprising people at a yodelling festival taking place nearby.

The Patrouille Suisse were due to fly over Langenbruck to honour the centenary of a Swiss flying pioneer.

But instead the team flew over the nearby town of Mümliswil, which was hosting the 31st Northwest Yodelling Festival.

"Wasn't it left at the big mountain?"
"No, definitely take a right then left at the church spire"
"Oh, fvck, the map's upside down..."

Still, at least it will have drowned out the sound of the yodelling
 

AlienFTM

MIA
Book Reviewer
Red Arrows did that at the weekend. Andy Murray was in the second game of his men's doubles when everything stopped for the Red Arrows.

Then the RAF showed their credentials by flying past over the London Pride parade. Maybe they thought it was a beer festival?
 
Em has played a blinder here

Expletive-laden Putin rant on Georgian TV leads to channel going off air
Giorgi Gabunia, a presenter on the main commercial TV channel in Georgia, used highly offensive language in a message to Vladimir Putin on Sunday. He went on to insult Mr Putin's mother.
Rustavi 2 TV apologised for the outburst and the channel decided to cut transmission for a few hours.
Georgia's prime minister, Mamuka Bakhtadze, deplored Gabunia's rant, saying "this is a war by provocateurs against their country, a dirty and disgusting game with the security of the state and citizens".


what could possibly go wrong for the presenter in the near future?

"Novichok" I hear you gasp?
 

Fang_Farrier

LE
Kit Reviewer
Book Reviewer
Em has played a blinder here





what could possibly go wrong for the presenter in the near future?

"Novichok" I hear you gasp?
Perhaps he could be made Ambassador to the USA?
 
The emperor whispered sweet words of encouragement, whip you tits out for the lads, it's the only way to stop them looking at your tits

 
At the shops yesterday.
Think to myself: "mmmm, maybe I'll get some sugar, I noticed the jar was almost empty this morning"
EM: No minion! You recall you bought a 2.5kg bag just a few weeks back?
Me: Yep, you're right.

Last night:
MrsRid:
We're out of sugar.
Me: Was there not a newish bag in the cupboard?
MrsRid: You know I made all those cakes last week... anyways, I found a couple of sugar sachets in my bag, so I'll be able to have a bedtime cuppa. Make sure you get some more tomorrow.
Me: Yes dear.

This morning:
Boil kettle, put instant coffee in mug. Oh bugger, no sugar!
EM: Hey look, there's still plenty of sugar in the jar - just solidified in the corners. Pop a bit of boiling water in, swish it about, pour into your mug, and top up with hot water.
Me: thanks Emp, brilliant idea. I forgive you for yesterday.
Kettle boils, pour a quarter cup into fancy glass sugar jar...
CRACK!
Now I have a quarter cup of boiling sugar water all over the counter, and worse, on my bare feet.
EM: Mwuahahahahahahah!
Now to explain to MrsRid what happened...
 
At the shops yesterday.
Think to myself: "mmmm, maybe I'll get some sugar, I noticed the jar was almost empty this morning"
EM: No minion! You recall you bought a 2.5kg bag just a few weeks back?
Me: Yep, you're right.

Last night:
MrsRid:
We're out of sugar.
Me: Was there not a newish bag in the cupboard?
MrsRid: You know I made all those cakes last week... anyways, I found a couple of sugar sachets in my bag, so I'll be able to have a bedtime cuppa. Make sure you get some more tomorrow.
Me: Yes dear.

This morning:
Boil kettle, put instant coffee in mug. Oh bugger, no sugar!
EM: Hey look, there's still plenty of sugar in the jar - just solidified in the corners. Pop a bit of boiling water in, swish it about, pour into your mug, and top up with hot water.
Me: thanks Emp, brilliant idea. I forgive you for yesterday.
Kettle boils, pour a quarter cup into fancy glass sugar jar...
CRACK!
Now I have a quarter cup of boiling sugar water all over the counter, and worse, on my bare feet.
EM: Mwuahahahahahahah!
Now to explain to MrsRid what happened...
Whoopee Goldberg...it’s coffee for winners...
 

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