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The Emperor Mongs Pronouncements

Those coppers are both polite and extremely patient, have to admire their restraint.
Quite often the police are vastly more patient and polite than I could possibly be.
 

ches

LE
Quite often the police are vastly more patient and polite than I could possibly be.

Indeed. I am actually relieved that both Cheshire & GMP constabularies denied my application to join many years ago. I'd have ended up sacked after smacking some fcukwit for monginess stupidity. You copper types on here, serving & retired, have my respect. I couldn't do it.
 
In UK they will often refer to themselves as Freemen on the Land. We went to a house with a similar sign on the front door 'You can't come in' he shouted. We had a large lump of metal and a Search Warrant which proved otherwise.

Old, but worth a re-run in context ....

BBC morning service eons ago broadcast live from church outside Broadcasting House. Some loony starts shouting and hollering, prompting someone stepping outside to grab a copper on duty (this is what they used to do, apparently).

Copper steps inside and asks the loony to come outside with him for a chat

Loony says "You can't arrest me, I'm Jesus Christ !"

Copper says , "That's OK sir, I'm Constable Pilate"


I can't vouch for the truth of this, only that I heard it about 40 years ago.
 
Romanian tart: That's a lovely necklace my son, the guy who hangs around with some of the dodgy geezers in the frame for robbing the Ecclestones' gaff, gave me last week.

The Emperor (PBUH): It is, you should wear it and post your picture wearing it on Facebook.

Tartescu: You sure? It won't attract attention will it?

His Purpleness: Nah, why would it? It's not like those rozzers in London would be checking out the social media of some prozzie in Bucharest now is it?

Allegedly.

 
Romanian tart: That's a lovely necklace my son, the guy who hangs around with some of the dodgy geezers in the frame for robbing the Ecclestones' gaff, gave me last week.

The Emperor (PBUH): It is, you should wear it and post your picture wearing it on Facebook.

Tartescu: You sure? It won't attract attention will it?

His Purpleness: Nah, why would it? It's not like those rozzers in London would be checking out the social media of some prozzie in Bucharest now is it?

Allegedly.


“Tartescu”... lol.
 
Read your post at work, then left to go home. Had two different ********* pull out straight in front of me on different roads. They were both looking straight at me when they drove in front of me.

I couldn't agree more.
Bloody hell, same thing happened last night at the same roundabout.
 

Fang_Farrier

LE
Kit Reviewer
Book Reviewer
Im a celebrity get me out of !!! whack thump ouch bugger will that do ya love ?


Woman gets to be a celebrity and gets out in an ambulance

taking pictures at night while crossing a busy road

probably seemed like a good idea at the time



Ambulance was not required, it was a hearse that was needing
 

ancienturion

LE
Book Reviewer

RBMK

LE
Book Reviewer
Go on lad, you're a supreme athlete with top reflexes, you even look a bit like Lewis Hamilton, never mind that you're in a big, tall 4x4 on off-road tyres, fling it round that bend...give it some welly, even though you're in the wrong lane and going too fast, 600bhp is no bother to you...

EXCLUSIVE: Terrifying moment young Arsenal star Joe Willock, 21, loses control of his £140,000 Mercedes G-Wagon, cutting across THREE lanes then clipping a crash barrier on the M25 and ending up in bushes


1606409366825.png


A bloke in a purple cloak was seen disappearing into the bushes shortly afterwards, chuckling
 

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