The economic crisis.

Discussion in 'The Intelligence Cell' started by vvaannmmaann, May 29, 2012.

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  1. The world wide bru ha ha about money and stuff, we all know about it and we have all heard the big fancy words used to explain it all away.
    Now imagine having to explain it to a ten year old.....any takers?
  2. Wordsmith

    Wordsmith LE Book Reviewer

    Lots of nations have lived a life they can't afford and have maxed out their credit cards. They can no longer pay back even the minimum monthly payment because they don't earn enough money to do so. They are heading for bankruptcy.

    Both the nations that lent the money and the nations that borrowed it are trying to pretend there isn't a problem with the maxed out credit cards because if things go tits up, the consequences for the credit card industry are going to be dire.

    The politicians are saying the problems with the maxed out credit cards are nothing to do with us. Many nations are asking for new credit cards so they can keep on spending without worrying about the debts on the old ones.

  3. When Mummys and Daddys love each other very much they go shopping.
    When they haven't got any money, nice people called 'bankers' used to let them buy things using other peoples money.
    The bankers were very silly, and let Mummy and Daddy buy too many things with other people's money.
    Now there isn't any money left, the bankers want it back, and that's why we haven't got a house any more.

    And thats why you, little Cheryl-Cole and little Akeesha are going to have to be what's called 'Child prostitutes' so that Mummy and Daddy can keep on buying things.
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  4. It's like Game Of Thrones but with less tit.
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  5. You know Jack And The Beanstalk? Well the feckin beans didn't work and the giant ate daddy's Merc, his pension and your college fund. Now get back out on that street corner, daddy's running low on fag money.
  6. Timmy lent you 3 marbles and you promised promised to pay him back 4. You now find you can't pay Timmy back. Timmy borrowed his marbles from Big Tommy whose now going to kick seven shades of shite out of you. You'll say you didn't know they were Big Tommy's and that you thought they were Timmy's whose a pussy so it's not your fault. You'll then continue to live with Mummy and Daddy and be a drain on their economy you little shite. It's not even as if we can put you on the game like your sister (0113 238 2035).
  7. Wordsmith

    Wordsmith LE Book Reviewer

    EU version.

    There is something called money. If you put it into a bank, clever people called bankers can make it seem as if there is twice as much of it as there is. Politicians like spending money. They will spend three times as much of it as there is.

    Money is magic. It never runs out, so European countries can keep on spending more and more of it without worrying about the consequences.

  8. "Shut up and suck. I'm paying for this, you know!"

    If it's been sent from my HTC Sensation using Tapatalk then I'm probably pissed.
  9. The German children's bedtime version:

    Once upon a time in Euroland there was a happy Leopard tank called Rolf who had been made by hard working Germans like Mummy and Daddy.

    Rolf got sold to a lazy Greek who borrowed money to pay for him off a generous German banker, Friendly Fritz from Frankfurt. Rolf found out this had happened to many little Leopard tanks and what is worse the lazy Greek only had one olive tree and could never pay Friendly Fritz who was sad.

    Friendly Fritz told the lazy Greek he should implement "austerity" and cut down his olive tree to sell for firewood, Friendly Fritz even offered the lazy Greek more money to buy more little Leopard tanks. But the lazy Greek just sat under his tree watching the olives rippen. This made Friendly Fritz very sad.

    One day the lazy Greek said something about "unsustainable trade imbalances" and Rolf was so angry he squashed the nasty man and his tree so flat they were just a big greasy stain. And then Rolf and all the little Leopard tanks invaded Turkey and squished more lazy people flat. And they all lived happily ever after.

    The End.
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  10. Thanks everyone.The kid's now understand.I however am a still confused.Can anyone explain it to a 51 year old?
  11. Alsacien

    Alsacien LE Moderator

    The removal of regulation by a short sighted government in the USA, allowed lending in a highly competitive mortgage market to descend into ever riskier territory.
    This risk was then passed around, re-sold and re-packaged as other products in another unregulated market.
    When everyone realised they were sitting on a pile of shit there was a rush for the doors, most were not quick enough.
    Major US lending corporations started to hit the wall, and the numbers got very big. So big the world markets were impacted.
    Then everyone else in the capitalist world started to look in their piles and see how much shit was in there.....
    • Like Like x 1

  12. I bet your kids love their bedtime stories, don't they?
    • Like Like x 2
  13. Everybody lent everybody else money they didn't have, everybody somehow paid it back, except the Greeks, Irish, Italians, Spaniards and Portugese, so now we're all fucked. Bastards.
  14. Bloody foreigners coming over here with their fiscal thingamajigs, it was better in the old days when you could get a bag of chips for a thrupenny bit, mind you some of those German bints are fit... where was I?
  15. Can it all be traced back to the sub-prime mortgage mis-selling by the septics?