The Difference Between the Infantry, the Artillery and the Armoured

Discussion in 'Armed Forces Jokes' started by msscorpio, Sep 13, 2010.

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  1. The Difference Between the Infantry, the Artillery and the Armoured

    HAPPINESS IS . . .

    Infantry: A good rifle
    Armoured: A big tank
    Artillery: A loud boom

    UPON HEARING FIREWORKS

    Infantry: Cool, just like a live fire exercise
    Armoured: Not loud enough
    Artillery: Fireworks? What fireworks?

    OTHER TRADES

    Infantry: Waste of rations
    Armoured: Waste of rations
    Artillery: Waste of rations

    IDEA OF FUN

    Infantry: Not having to "pepper-pot" an entire grid square before the
    objective
    Armoured: Racing across a grid square on "full stab"
    Artillery: Leveling a grid square

    FAVOURITE SONG

    Infantry: "Ballad of the Green Beret"
    Armoured: "Purple Haze"
    Artillery: Anything, just play it LOUD!

    BIGGEST LUXURY IN THE FIELD

    Infantry: Engineers blowing trenches for them with C4
    Armoured: Grunts to dig their trenches for them
    Artillery: Cable

    A LONG ROUTE MARCH WITH FULL KIT

    Infantry: 20 clicks
    Armoured: From the hangars to the tank
    Artillery: What's a route march?

    OFFICERS

    Infantry: Are morons and should stay away from the trench lines
    Armoured: Are morons and should stay out of the vehicles
    Artillery: Are morons and should stay away from the gun lines

    FAVORITE MODE OF TRANSPORTATION

    Infantry: Anything but walking
    Armoured: Tanks. Tanks. Tanks. TankstankstankstanksTANKS!
    Artillery: Don't you have to move around to require transport?

    BIGGEST GRIPE IN THE FIELD

    Infantry: The weather
    Armoured: Coffee maker in tank not working
    Artillery: Only having basic cable

    BREAKFAST IN THE FIELD

    Infantry: I don't care what it is, just so long as I can sit down to eat it
    Armoured: Hot coffee and rum with a beer chaser
    Artillery: Eggs over easy, crispy bacon, sausages, toast and fresh coffee
     
  2. Bias to the Artillery of course :twisted:
     
  3. not bad but what about us paras, you know the ones the rest want to be but without the hard work just the badges and glory.
     
  4. "Particularly the ones who we threw down the stairs at The Saskatchewan Bar in Osnabruck."

    :?: 8O
    LMAO

    Liked This One.