The Difference Between Football and Rugby

Discussion in 'The Intelligence Cell' started by Storeman Norman, Nov 25, 2003.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. ViroBono

    ViroBono LE Moderator

    The list would not be complete without the Leeds player recently charged with rape.
     
  2. Football - A game for gentlemen played by hooligans.
    Rugby - A game for hooligans played by gentlemen.
    --"The Wonderful World of Rugby" by Jon Clarke
     
  3. The difference is the size and build of the players and the size and shape of the balls :D
     
  4. OK if it's quotes you want:

    Rugby is a game for the mentally deficient... That is why it was invented by the British. Who else but an Englishman could invent an oval ball?
    Peter Pook Pook's Love Nest
     
  5. Classic!
     
  6. I'm on a roll now:

    To Princess Anne's son Peter Phillips, Gordonstoun School's rugby captain, for his pre-match coin-toss preference -Grandmother or tails, sir?
    Anon rugby referee (1995)
     
  7. Now that's a good one....and it will be stolen and banded... where do you get them ....or is it years of reading?
     
  8. BBC, I would love to say that I read a lot (I do - but need lots of pictures and 16 pitch letters) or that I am a witty and clever bloke who is a lot of fun to sit next to at a dinner party. Sadly I'm a geek who spends a lot of time surfing that fount of all knowledge - the www. Sorry.
     
  9. I believe it's the geeks who haven't found the www. yet and we progressive types who use this fountain of knowledge to make us better people to sit with at dinner parties?
     
  10. blessedbabycakes1810 said:
    fountain of knowledge it may be, but suggest you don't believe everything you see on the www. is it exactly what it appears to be!! :D
     
  11. I would be absolutely fine at these parties if I could work out how to say sh1t, or fcuk or even cnut which are some new words I've learnt since drinking at said fountain. Any ideas? Or should I run them through the spell checker again?
     
  12. MPS you said,
    "I would be absolutely fine at these parties if I could work out how to say sh1t, or fcuk or even cnut which are some new words I've learnt since drinking at said fountain. Any ideas? Or should I run them through the spell checker again?"

    Did you mean you want to say these words at dinner parties MPS????
    If yes, then you really need to think about the context of the work, I meant highly inappropriate to turn to the hostess at any point and say 'Sh1t Lady Head-Up-Bum, that is by far and fcuk the best bacon I’ve tasted since cnut knows when!' :D

    And as for running them through the spell checker.... I feel the nasty bumper sticker quote coming on..... Please ensure brain is in gear, before allowing mouth to drive off!.... Maybe would help.....Failing that only go to dinner parties hosted by other members of this site! :roll:

    Oh, shudder, it obviously would NOT be a family event! 8O
     
  13. Ah BBC! Very funny. Very funny indeed. Just read your reply out around the office (protecting sources, of course), after brief background introduction. General agreement that you are a good egg with finely tuned sense of humour. Perhaps you should get your bones over to this place - it needs an injection of humour!

    Or are you fully booked at the Comedy Store?
     
  14. Sorry fully paid up Civil Servant........could you imagine the suicide rate in Whitehall if the few who still remember how to smile left!!!!!!!
    Yea Gods.....it doesn't bare thinking about!
    Or on the other hand it may actually free up some posts for promotion......
    Go to go, job section of the Guardian is calling.....