The derren brown of periods

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by arrsemeister, Oct 2, 2010.

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  1. My mate can guess a girl's next period and is accurate to the day. How the hell is this done?
    He is a hit with the ladies despite looking like he was facially raped by a sledgehammer, how can I learn this fine art?
  2. Well at a guess he asked them?

    However he would have a very hard time guessing some women's.

  3. You can't learn it - he's most likely telling them that he's gay.

    At least that's my strategy when I'm out at a club with mates. Casually drop the words "my boyfriend and I" into a sentence and they swarm around you. Helps that my friends don't smoke so outside the club whilst having a quick puff is the perfect time to 'confess'.

    Pisses them off when I spend the night dancing and talking to women.

    If only they knew...
  4. Poof Walt.......
  5. Have you asked him where the injuries from the sledgehammer came from?

    I rest my case.......
  6. And then what? You put the hard word on them, and they're too dumb to realise that you've lied to them?

    Trowel's right; you, sir, are a Mauve Walt.
  7. Lezzer. Dirty dirty person.
  8. I'm not ashamed! Well...okay maybe I am a little bit.

    Given I've got a girlfriend I'm not on the pull anyway lol.

    And no, no bragging or nothing. I've actually come clean with the guys about it recently and received a stern telling off. The way they act on a night out does my nut in - given that I look like a vigorously slapped arse and the other lads are good looking, trendy guys. They just plain refuse to talk to women, despite being fairly confident. On a tense night out, instead of having a drink and a laugh, they get very serious about it and spend the night wistfully standing in the corner, hardly speaking and trying to look cool and nonchalant. Then at the end of the night they mope about how gorgeous the girl in red top or the girl in white dress was when they couldn't even make eye contact with her.

    My mates are lovely and all...they just take pulling far too seriously, it can ruin a good night. Me wandering around talking to lassies and dancing away tends to drag them out of their stupour.

    Even if I did walt as a homosexual just to pull it off.

    Ack...either way I can't form a reasonable excuse lol.
  9. (mutters) A likely story! OK, I'll believe you, but thousands wouldn't! :)

    Joking aside, I'm just as hopeless as your mates, only wthout being trendy...or cool...or nonchalant either, for that matter...maybe you've got the right idea.