The Death Psychic

#1
The Death Psychic

enter your name, age and sex, and it will tell you of your demise.

LET IT BE TOLD! -
While visiting your favorite bookstore, you get caught in the middle of a violent melee between rival book clubs. Unable to escape the madness, you are beaten to death with a hardcover unabridged dictionary.
thats me staying out of smiths books then.
 
#2
LET IT BE TOLD! -
After swallowing several capsules which you thought were pain relievers, you're told that you were given "foam animal in a capsule" capsules as a joke. The foam animals expand to twenty times their original size, causing a major intestinal obstruction. Unable to pass solid waste, you die from self-toxification.
Hmm, foam animals eh? Oh well, I'm going to die, but I couldn't give a sh!t.........


.....taxi!!
 
#4
LET IT BE TOLD! -

You are taken hostage as part of a bank robbery. When law enforcement refuses to meet the demands of the suspect, the suspect shoots you in the head to prove to the cops that he means business.
Thank heavens for Cash Machines :D :D
 
#5
LET IT BE TOLD
A deranged lunatic splashes you in the face with a bucket full of hydrofluoric acid, immediately melting the flesh from your skull.
HYDROFLOURIC :D

Ammonia soaked underpants in a ziploc bag will protect me like a shield of steel.



Thats my excuse and I'm sticking to it :oops:
 
#6
Rubbish.

I put in Stuart Lubbock, 31 and there was no mention of anal sex or Michael Barrymore.
 
#7
While running to your car, you stumble on a curb and your body is thrown violently to the street. Moments later, you are engulfed and mutilated by a street sweeper
Glad I live somewhere where rubbish isn't allowed to lie in the street too long
 
#9
Priam said:
Ex_ex said:
Rubbish.

I put in Stuart Lubbock, 31 and there was no mention of anal sex or Michael Barrymore.
Are you a fan :D
Are you referring to anal sex or to Michael Barrymore? :wink:
 
#11
While taking a leisurely stroll down a country road, a distracted farmer runs you over with his combine, shredding your body into ribbons.
:roll:

*sings*
Cuz I got a brand new combine harvester
An' I'll give you the key
Come on now let's get together
In perfect harmony
I got twenty acres
An' you got forty-three
Now I got a brand new combine harvester
An' I'll give you the key
 
#12
I typed in Anthony Blair..............

LET IT BE TOLD ..........A disgruntled coworker beats you to death with a bag full of loose change.

Where is Gordon anyway ?
 
#13
crabby said:
While running to your car, you stumble on a curb and your body is thrown violently to the street. Moments later, you are engulfed and mutilated by a street sweeper
Glad I live somewhere where rubbish isn't allowed to lie in the street too long
Pikies beat you to it?
 
#14
A gang of midgets wraps you in plastic wrap and proceeds to cook you with a hair dryer. You are slowly squeezed to death as the plastic wrap shrinks around your body.

Cool sounds like fun if your into that kind of thing
 
#16
dan_man said:
lLET IT BE TOLD! -While rummaging through the trunk of your car, a disgruntled neighbor approaches you from behind and slams the trunk repeatedly onto you, eventually cutting you in half at the waist.
Nice! :lol:
That could have been a lot worse!! :lol: :lol: :lol:
 
#20
A gang of midgets wraps you in plastic wrap and proceeds to cook you with a hair dryer. You are slowly squeezed to death as the plastic wrap shrinks around your body.
Hmm. Sounds like some sort of disturbing bedroom game 8O
 

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