The Buddha and the Bumper

Discussion in 'Sappers' started by whit_RE, Jan 3, 2007.

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  1. Apart from the Quad and toasted teacakes, other items i remember from 3 Tp 57 trg sqn are the concrete buddha and the rubber bumper decked out in corps colours.

    They were a feature of daily life during our B3 course in 89, especially if you'd fcuked up and had to carry the fecking things. They even took pride of place in the MGB photo that i've still got.

    Does anybody else have fond memories of these prize items?

    Are they still in regular use?
  2. we had a big bit of 4x4 that we had to dress in what ever kit we were wearing. It was a nightmare especially quickchange parades and room inspections that bloody thing had to be smarter than we did.
  3. On my Cadre one of my room mates Charlie B*e got caught with an empty coke bottle on room inspection.

    Spr Bottle was 'born' and had to be taken everywhere with us dressed in Combats and on room inspections he had to be stood at attention on Charlie's bed next to his bed layout.
  4. The concrete Buddah was called "Sumo" and was a daily feature of life in 3 troop 57 in 1987.... duty tool of the day had to carry the heavy little cunt everywhere with him which got extremely interesting during the watermanship phase of training :)

    He had his own bedspace, which had to be kept immaculate, and 1 room every week were put in charge of it, any failiures to come up to scratch on Sumo's part would involve the room who were looking after him parading behind the guard, with Sumo, and with Sumo's bed space for one of those really fun evenings of leg raises, quick changes etc etc....

    The other feature of life in the troop was the daily nominated "duty hero" this would be someone who in the DS's eyes was so fucking stupid he must be brave...

    Duty heroes only duty, was upon receipt of the cry "grenaaaaade" and the hurling of a grenade sized stone, to dash to the stone, jump on it thus saving the troop from death, and die in a suitably theatrical and noisy way.... and then resume his place in the ranks where he would be marked on speed, effort and heroicness of death, the amount of times the grenade was thrown was directly linked to these marks.

    again... very interesting during the assault boat phase where the shout of "grennaaaaaade" was followed by a "plop" into hawley lake followed by duty hero diving in.

    mein gott that was a fucker of a course, and as we were constantly reminded "We fucking hate ex JL troops at 3 trg regt."

    They certainly did.
  5. At Arborfield with 82 Sqn in late ninties as an instructor we used to have a Duty Wilma.

    On any Cpl shouting 'Wilmaaaaaaa' the duty wilma would have to run from his room to the Troop Office and recite:

    Yaba Daba Doo,Would you like a brew Corporal? (in a Fred Flintstone style)

    This would obviously follow by the Duty Wilma getting the brews on. We enjoyed it any way!!
  6. Didn't one of the intakes have an action man sapper with his own bedspace in a cardboard box and whenever they paraded so did "he"?....and he also got inspected when they creases an all! :D
  7. deleted as bratty fingers strikes gain
    :x 8O :roll: :wink:
  8. We had Cpl Sumo in late 90 and I was last to have him in our intake
    about 3 weeks from the end so did I keep him for 3 weeks for being a k nob NO i got him for gobbing off (Surprise 8O - just getting in first knocker :wink: )
    ireceived him just after naafi (when we were supposed to buy the fullscrews brews :x ) however after lunch I was summoned to Cpl J** (Christ his surname escapes me 7' tall tanky bloke got shouted at at tidders for standing up in his spartan leaving camp then stood up in his spartan and shouted back at the adj that HE WAS F***ING SITTING DOWN but i digress) and told we had to go down Hawley and set up and that as he was going we could go in his car so of course I left sumo wedged nicely behind his seat which was pushed all the way back so no-one ever noticed it (or not untill we left anyhow) and then spent the rest of the time denying that i'd ever had him :D
  9. ahh yes my troop jem a was fortunate enough to avoid the buddah but the duty biatch was made to carry the stick of power around which was a rather large staff about 6 ft long which we had to paint corps colours and when marching had to be carried like a pace stick. when at ease the staff was placed but on the floor next to left foot and top held arms length away from body and upon arrival of full screw staffy or troopy whilst standing to attention brought in paralell to body. If not done properly we would hear those immortal words PIANOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! or DOG SECTION HILLLLL!!!!!!!!!!
  10. Ah, yes the Piano, I remember it well....
  11. All I can remember from Gib Bks was the immortal cry of "waaaalllll". Normally cried by Sgt Geordie Br*m*eld. The wall was the far accomodation block (57 Sqn in '84) and 4Tp 28 Trg Sqn were in the furthest block back...

    I cant, for the life of me, remember how we were punished in 57 Sqn... punishments seemed to be more "enjoyable", such as a tab or run on a Fri afternoon, then into the block to eat jacobs crackers and a wheetabix, washed down with a can of ale. One block, Dougie (cant remember surname) had *never* drunk alcohol before, and was pished before he had finished the can.
  12. Bumpers, bumpers... horrible bloody things. Standard issue in 4Tp, rdoubling around the inner quadrangle with them...

    We had a total fitness fanatic in the troop, Steve C*pp*n. Rumour had it that prior to enlisting, he was a candidate for the British Olympic Karate sqaud. He had been backpartied when he broke his arm. Along the lenght of the bone. He was a fit fecker, tall and wiry, with muscles on his muscles. I reckon had they had body mass index tests in those days he would have scored a minus reading. There again, he wasnt perfect; he had a bloody great beak and was from Brum land, with an accent to match. But god help you if you extracted the urine or asked him to repeat himself...

    Now whilst the rest of us got shat on from a great height, it was apparent that Steve didn't quite get the same level of grief. Not suprising, the NCO's were bloody scared of him. When he did get a bumper beasting, he had TWO of the fecking things, one on each shoulder, and still ran around for bloody hours.

    Remember the pathetically silly fitness tests; dips, heaves, pushups, etc? Well the PTI's would start him off, go grab a brew, then come back and tell him to stop as he had scored max points.

    We had an afternoon off once, so he and I went down town. On way back, the DS had posted the new room allocations (this of course being back in the days when basic training had a 50%+ drop out rate). I didnt catch his comments on his new room mates, and asked him to repeat... fatal fecking mistake as next thing I knew I had flown six foot sideways after a punch in the head.

    I heard he was posted to 28 Hameln, where news of his arrival preceeded him, and the hardest bloke in the unit was waiting. Apparently, they had one hell of a punch up in the naafi.. anyone from 28 at the time (summer 84 onwards) confirm this?

    Great block though, bumped into him every 3 years until we both left in 96. I'll never forget when the CO's were tasked with letting those in the Phase 3 redundancy bracket whether they were staying or going. The CO at 38 Ripon had the unenviable task of breaking the news to Steve regarding redundancy, and no one knew if he wanted or not, nor how he woudl take it. Consequently, the guard were bought in and lined up behind the CO. By coincidence, Geordie Br*mh*ld was the acting RSM... guess who absented himself for that little interview!

    Sorry, bit off topic from bumpers, but I'll never forget the sight of Steve running around the quad with a bumper on each shoulder, looking bored.
  13. I was in 3tp 57 Trg Sqn in 1987, and I remember a lad who was "given" the Budda for the week. He threw it out of a top window and it smashed - I can only presume they either got another or had the mould for it!
    I also recall having to mark time in the "dry gap" at the bridge site when it was 3-4 ft deep in mud!! Happy Days!! Hurrah for the CRE.
  14. Who were your DS... was it "hippo", and Andy H**t? plus George... name escapes me, and big shuggy, oh.... and who could forget "cool hand" eddy seale (RIP).??
  15. I can see their faces, but I'm bu**ered if I can remember their names, Staffy with a swagger stick and a jock 59 fella with a lovely big black tache..
    I was charged sec. 69A army act for "inciting theft" because I left my locker keys under my pillow!!!
    I also remember watching "dirty dancing" at the pictures, and getting spammed on six cans of charlie bought from the "box office" - if only they knew!!