Sitting in a bar the Scotsman says, "As good as this bar is, I still prefer the pubs back home. In Glasgow, there's a wee place called McTavish's. The landlord goes out of his way for the locals. When you buy four drinks, he'll buy the fifth drink." "Well Angus," said the Englishman, "That's really good, but at my local in London, the Fox and Dogs, the barman will buy you your third drink after you buy the first two." "Ahhh, dat's nothin'," said the Irishman, "back home in my favorite pub Cagney's, the moment you set foot in the place, they'll buy you a drink, then another, all the drinks you like. Then, when you've had enough drinks, they'll take you upstairs and see that you gets laid, all on the house!" The Englishman and Scotsman were dubious of the claims. The Irishman swore every word was true. Then the Englishman asked, "Did this actually happen to you?" "Not meself, personally, no," admitted the Irishman, "but it did happen to me sister a few times."