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The Arrse Torch

I don't think you could get her to run but with the application of enough pitch with a stiff yard brush you could certainly put flame to her and roll her down a hill like a flaming barrel of tar.
Given the understandable view that the Olympic torch procession is a bit naff (to put it mildly) why doesn't Arrse set up its own?

Who would you like to see jogging through your town holding a flaming Cornetto? I'll kick off with....
Do you wish another earthquake on New Zealand,for it will surely happen if that ever shifts its monstrous carcass.


Can we not just extinguish the fucking over sized cig lighters and weigh them all in for beer tokens?


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I would like to see Lord 'Kerching' Coe running through my town with the torch, well lit but rammed up his arrse. A veritable Knight (OK he is a Lordy) of the Flaming Arrseholes.

The fecking Director of News and other shite on BBC must be in line for a good gong the way the news can't be read without an update on where the torch (or rather one of the many) is and who is carrying it. If there are any BBC apparat-chicks reading this then please take note - I DON'T GIVE A FLYING FUCK ABOUT THE OLYMPIC TORCH.

aaaannndd breathe! :)

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