The ARRSE Cabinet

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by The_IRON, Jun 8, 2011.

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  1. Looking at Peter Dows attempts to bring in a new government has got me thinking if ARRSE could rule the UK instead........we can look at the rest of the establishment later on but who would you have in the ARRSE cabinet?? A few of my suggestions would be.

    Prime Minister, First Lord of the Treasury and Minister for the Civil Service
    The Right Honourable GOOD CO

    Deputy Prime Minister, Lord President of the Council (with special responsibility for political and constitutional reform)
    The Right Honourable BAD CO

    HM Treasury
    Chancellor of the Exchequer
    The Right Honourable SPANISH DAVE

    Foreign and Commonwealth Office
    First Secretary of State, Secretary of State for Foreign and Commonwealth Affairs
    The Right Honourable SMUDGER67ER

    Ministry of Justice
    Lord Chancellor, Secretary of State for Justice
    The Right Honourable SANDMANFEZ

    Home Office
    Secretary of State for the Home Department; and Minister for Women and Equalities
    The Right Honourable THE_SNAIL

    Ministry of Defence
    Secretary of State for Defence
    The Right Honourable FALLSCHIRMJAGER

    Department for Work and Pensions
    Secretary of State for Work and Pensions
    The Right Honourable VIROBONO

    Department of Health
    Secretary of State for Health
    The Right Honourable JARROD

    Department for Business, Innovation and Skills
    Secretary of State for Business, Innovation and Skills, and President of the Board of Trade
    The Right Honourable ARTERS

    Department for Communities and Local Government
    Secretary of State for Communities and Local Government
    The Right Honourable UGLY

    Department for Transport
    Secretary of State for Transport
    The Right Honourable STACKER

    Department for Environment, Food and Rural Affairs
    Secretary of State for Environment, Food and Rural Affairs
    The Right Honourable BIGBIRD67

    Department for International Development
    Secretary of State for International Development
    The Right Honourable FIVEALPHA

    Department for Culture, Media and Sport
    Secretary of State for Culture, Olympics, Media and Sport
    The Right Honourable DRAIN_SNIFFER

    Northern Ireland Office
    Secretary of State for Northern Ireland
    The Right Honourable BRITISH AND PROUD

    Scotland Office
    Secretary of State for Scotland
    The Right Honourable HEIDTHEBA

    Wales Office
    Secretary of State for Wales
    The Right Honourable Porridge Gun

    Office of the Leader of the House of Lords
    Leader of the House of Lords
    The Right Honourable REBEL WITHOUT A CAUSE

    Ive tried to put names next to jobs but if you think your better at the role or even the one whos been suggested voice your opinions. Main thing lads, laddettes and Sluggy we dont want the fuckwit Dow in charge. Nearly forgot we need a WHIP so think Dolly would be up for that one, if shes still around.
  2. Can I be the tea lady?
  3. Can I be Immigration Minister? Pretty please!

    I promise to be fair and even handed
  4. Can I emigrate?
    • Like Like x 2
  5. You ought to put Stacker in charge of negotiations within the EU. His talent for unyielding, unreasoning refusal to engage with any argument on any terms bar his own, would be an asset in the role.
    • Like Like x 2
  6. You nearly had a chance till you said Fair and Even Handed
  7. You won't let anybody in, then?
  8. I'll be Minister for Europe if the job's going :-D
  9. I wanted STACKER in the Cabinet so put him as Transport...but seeing hes RAG AND SHAG thought of either ptting him catering or Driving....that will teach him.
  10. That's lovely, now where do I get the expense forms from?
    • Like Like x 1

  11. But I will be.

    Just so long as you are British, by birth, parents birth and grandparents birth. Or you are serving Her Majesty with a big gun in hand.
    Otherwise yer out!
  12. Any slots for Minister of Shite Excuses?
    • Like Like x 1

  13. Errrrr, well thats the gist of it :)
  14. B_AND_T

    B_AND_T LE Book Reviewer

    Can I run the stationery store?
    • Like Like x 1
  15. Iron Duke wants to be SOS for Wales...he loves Welshies. Give him the job?

    I would like to be Minister for Schools with special responsibility for all-girl Sixth Form Colleges...purely out of altruism.