The ARRSE Beer Guide.

Just sipping my first Chimay 150 (aka 'Green'), and although decent enough (as all Chimay's products are), it has a little too much bitterness on the initial taste, and a little too little overall mouth-feel or 'body', so won't be toppling Chimay Bleu from its position as my range favourite.
 
Paying a visit to Lidl the other day, I found a few bottles of something I hadn't previously seen there :
'Abbeye de Vauclair' Imperiale, labelled as a French Lager with Orange Peel. It came with a fizzy-wine type of cork, so must be good; buy. I'm glad I did; it's very good, but outrageously powerful at 7,5 vol. and also reassuringly expensive.

Pity I can't re-use the bottles, being designed for a cork, as I'm also into my annual beer-brew; a St Peter's IPA, a Brew-Ferm barley wine and a Hammer of Thor lager. Usual mistakes will be made, and I'll end up back at Lidl for Perlenbacher. Unless...

I was sure that there was a thread full of home-brew stuff some time back, but I can't find it; @Brotherton Lad, who does this sort of thing at a higher level of expertise than me, should start a comprehensive one.
 
I had 4 cans of Adnams Ghost Ship last night (and very nice it was too), to wash down a King Prawn Curry. Oh. Dear. God. My ARRSE this morning ! I produced the largest, stickiest, stinkiest turd in the history of man. Thankfully I was checking out of the motel room thereafter but I offer silent apologies to the housekeeping staff who had to go in there after me!
 
I had 4 cans of Adnams Ghost Ship last night (and very nice it was too), to wash down a King Prawn Curry. Oh. Dear. God. My ARRSE this morning ! I produced the largest, stickiest, stinkiest turd in the history of man. Thankfully I was checking out of the motel room thereafter but I offer silent apologies to the housekeeping staff who had to go in there after me!
You know the score, pics or it didn’t happen.
 
I had 4 cans of Adnams Ghost Ship last night (and very nice it was too), to wash down a King Prawn Curry. Oh. Dear. God. My ARRSE this morning ! I produced the largest, stickiest, stinkiest turd in the history of man. Thankfully I was checking out of the motel room thereafter but I offer silent apologies to the housekeeping staff who had to go in there after me!
Far too much information. You need David Beckham Aftershave; covers up the stinkiest poo.
 
Paying a visit to Lidl the other day, I found a few bottles of something I hadn't previously seen there :
'Abbeye de Vauclair' Imperiale, labelled as a French Lager with Orange Peel. It came with a fizzy-wine type of cork, so must be good; buy. I'm glad I did; it's very good, but outrageously powerful at 7,5 vol. and also reassuringly expensive.

Pity I can't re-use the bottles, being designed for a cork, as I'm also into my annual beer-brew; a St Peter's IPA, a Brew-Ferm barley wine and a Hammer of Thor lager. Usual mistakes will be made, and I'll end up back at Lidl for Perlenbacher. Unless...

I was sure that there was a thread full of home-brew stuff some time back, but I can't find it; @Brotherton Lad, who does this sort of thing at a higher level of expertise than me, should start a comprehensive one.
Abbaye de Vauclair is a French biere du garde (barrel aged beer) from the excellent Brasserie Goudale. Cork-sealed 750ml bottles are typical of the region and the style. I can't think of a biere du garde that I've even had with a crown seal, or maybe I've had too many bieres du garde. Unsurprisingly, given their geographical relationship, bieres du garde are similar in style and taste to biere Belge, generally tended toward the Blonde, Ambree or Brune/Dubbel.
 
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Far too much information. You need David Beckham Aftershave; covers up the stinkiest poo.

Nay, nay and thrice nay. When departing hotel accommodation stinky droppings should be left as a mark of pride of one's great bowel deposits and the glorious aroma thereof should be allowed to be appreciated by those who are fortunate enough to discover them. It's good to share.
 
Nay, nay and thrice nay. When departing hotel accommodation stinky droppings should be left as a mark of pride of one's great bowel deposits and the glorious aroma thereof should be allowed to be appreciated by those who are fortunate enough to discover them. It's good to share.
Fecken pikey. At the very least, slice them with your Jungle Knife before exit. And pay your minibar bill, pikey.
Does it come in a posh box?
Indeed. and with a complementary 1 litre bottle of his exquisite Club Haig Clubman, in the blue bottle of exquisiteness. Exquisitely designed to polish the finest 1st Division Erse (use only with silken sheets of Harrod's exquisite Kleenex (© Izal).
 

Brotherton Lad

LE
Kit Reviewer
Paying a visit to Lidl the other day, I found a few bottles of something I hadn't previously seen there :
'Abbeye de Vauclair' Imperiale, labelled as a French Lager with Orange Peel. It came with a fizzy-wine type of cork, so must be good; buy. I'm glad I did; it's very good, but outrageously powerful at 7,5 vol. and also reassuringly expensive.

Pity I can't re-use the bottles, being designed for a cork, as I'm also into my annual beer-brew; a St Peter's IPA, a Brew-Ferm barley wine and a Hammer of Thor lager. Usual mistakes will be made, and I'll end up back at Lidl for Perlenbacher. Unless...

I was sure that there was a thread full of home-brew stuff some time back, but I can't find it; @Brotherton Lad, who does this sort of thing at a higher level of expertise than me, should start a comprehensive one.
Here you go:


Haven't brewed for a year because I was nursing my wife. So, currently buying Tripel Karmeliet (it's those monks again). Treat it with respect, 8.4% abv. Tesco £5 for 750ml.
 
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Here you go:


Haven't brewed for a year because I was nursing my wife. So, currently buying Tripel Karmeliet (it's those monks again). Treat it with respect, 8.4% abv. Tesco £5 for 750ml.

While it is an 'abbey style', no monks (or nuns in this case) are involved in the production of Triple Karmeliet.

'In the hands of the Bosteels family for over 200 years, the brewery relies today on the craftmanship of seven generations. In 1791, Jean-Baptist Bosteels established the brewery, and has been followed by generations who took over the brewery with zeal and never stop brewing even during the world wars.'

 

Brotherton Lad

LE
Kit Reviewer
While it is an 'abbey style', no monks (or nuns in this case) are involved in the production of Triple Karmeliet.

'In the hands of the Bosteels family for over 200 years, the brewery relies today on the craftmanship of seven generations. In 1791, Jean-Baptist Bosteels established the brewery, and has been followed by generations who took over the brewery with zeal and never stop brewing even during the world wars.'


I know.
 
Whilst languishing in Bujumbura early ‘06, waiting for delayed deployment inbounds, my local chaps invited me to join them for their end-of-work relaxers … how could I refuse such gracious hospitality? Indeed, this, in 1litre bottles, as produced locally, distributed in 12-bottle crates before noon, had not really benefitted from sitting in the shebeen courtyard during the pre-dusk time. But if you’re drinking for effect, rather than appreciation, it certainly works … after you get the first few mouthfuls down …
6871D593-BBD1-44C1-9040-5D916371C8F0.jpeg

… to say that I was grateful when the deployment arrived, bearing gifts, would be something of an understatement!
B53D3FE3-75D6-4170-A330-0CCFC9D9FCF6.jpeg
 
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Whilst languishing in Bujumbura early ‘06, waiting for delayed deployment inbounds, my local chaps invited me to join them for their end-of-work relaxers … how could I refuse such gracious hospitality? Indeed, this, in 1litre bottles, as produced locally, distributed in 12-bottle crates before noon, had not really benefitted from sitting in the shebeen courtyard during the pre-dusk time. But if you’re drinking for effect, rather than appreciation, it certainly works … after you get the first few mouthfuls down …
View attachment 594865
… to say that I was grateful when the deployment arrived, bearing gifts, would be something of an understatement!
View attachment 594866
Where’s the rum from? Last time I was in Oz, I don’t remember any Rum distilling Monasteries being there!
 
Whilst languishing in Bujumbura early ‘06, waiting for delayed deployment inbounds, my local chaps invited me to join them for their end-of-work relaxers … how could I refuse such gracious hospitality? Indeed, this, in 1litre bottles, as produced locally, distributed in 12-bottle crates before noon, had not really benefitted from sitting in the shebeen courtyard during the pre-dusk time. But if you’re drinking for effect, rather than appreciation, it certainly works … after you get the first few mouthfuls down …
View attachment 594865
… to say that I was grateful when the deployment arrived, bearing gifts, would be something of an understatement!
Africa has some (surprisingly, to those who decry all things African) excellent beers; Namibia kept up the traditions of their German braumeisters in the production of reinheitsgebot-compliant pilsner, in Rhodesia and Zimbabwe, Bohlingers was definitely a klasse act, and in Tanzania, of all places, there were a couple of locally-produced lagers/pilsners which could compete with the world's best. Guinness's local product in Nigeria, although tasting a little odd from the sorghum (in the place of barley) is fiercely powerful and definitely a fighting ale. @Lardbeast could possibly elaborate.

Meanwhile, in the EU, Cyprus would give us Carlsberg and Keo, which in the wrong bottles and under a summer sun could put you down for weeks.
 
Where’s the rum from? Last time I was in Oz, I don’t remember any Rum distilling Monasteries being there!

It's Indian, so really should be called 'Old Swami'.
 
Where’s the rum from? Last time I was in Oz, I don’t remember any Rum distilling Monasteries being there!
Variously known as “The Ancient Cleric”/“Dr Monk” is of Northern Indian origin, and is the descendant of that provided to the soldiers of the Raj; Moham Meakin distillery is well worth the research, and visit, should you find yourself in Uttar Pradesh. I was introduced to it whilst contracted to prepare Indian military and Police personnel for deployment on peacekeeping operations, and in my various contracts doing such I managed to regularly source the nectar. The diagonal stripe on the bottle denotes distilled for, and only to be sold, in Military Messes; no stripe, sold to the public.
Nowadays, alas, as a dithering retiree/pensioner home in the Antipodes I find I can occasionally source it from a retailer in Melbourne, but it is some ten times the price I paid for it in the Messes in Delhi and Mumbai, and not quite the same quality … ah, a burrah-peg before retiring for the evening … thanks, don’t mind if I do!
C74A820F-4F37-46CA-AE73-4AA809B3EA04.jpeg

… altho’ Mem’ may have poured a patiala, in this instance!
 
Lidl's in Scotland do an IPA called 'Double Joker'. It's like 8.3% but has a very pleasant hoppy/ citrusy flavour to it, and you don't feel like some jake bag skulling Special Brew. The 6.2% 'Broughton Ale' IPA found in Sainsbury's is also of a decent similar flavour. Tried the 'Red McGregor' from Lidl's a few times though not really a fan of the ruby IPAs, though nice enough.
 

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