The Annual Whinging Cnut thread.

Discussion in 'The ARRSE Hole' started by Praetorian, Mar 7, 2012.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. Esteemed Gentlemen,

    It is now drawing close to the end of the training year, and I thought it'd be a rather spiffing idea to provide a shit encrusted dumping ground for all the dribble soon to infest these fine pages, as it does every year. Save the MODs a bit of work as well.

    So, be it QDJM related, the regiment not running certain MATTs, or the spectre of Key Weekends rearing their ugly heads, vent them here.

    To kick us off, I'll go with the fat knacker driver who has just been downgraded, 3 weeks before the final MATTs weekend of the year. Apparently he's been carrying a bad back and a bad knee, and its only just flared up. Fat wannabe flyboy cunt.

    I thank you,

    P
     
  2. I'm offering 10-1 that this thread gets derailed into an Officer recruitment and retention fest within 2 pages. Anyone?
     
    • Like Like x 2
  3. You just did.
     
  4. You don't fancy a flutter then?

    In the spirit of re-railing the thread, I qualified for my bounty sometime in july. I'm not going to get a QDJM, which I don't give a fuck about and everythings dandy in my corner of stabland.

    Bollocks - failed again.
     
  5. When is bounty in this year?
     
  6. It's been cancelled to save a few quid.
     
  7. Oh well fair enough, hopefully they'll use the money to buy some Harriers or give us pensions instead.
     
  8. The word is spelled "whining."

    I assume there is a reason you need to spell "cunt" with the middle letters reversed.
     
    • Like Like x 1
  9. 5 of my sqn fellow seniors have been down graded without doing any matts but will still get thier 'Fit for role' bonus as its not thier fault they can't run more than 5 yards and as for tabbing 6 mile,fill in the blanks yourself gents. we do have the annual punch up to drive the jack wagon though, thats always entertaining.

    And what we need to do to keep the blokes interested..............................................I'll save that page two.
     
  10. You sure know how to make friends and influence people! Fuck off noob!
     
  11. walkyrie

    walkyrie Old-Salt Book Reviewer

    For some people Bounty/MATTs is like Christmas.

    It comes round every year, on the same day. You have 364 days to prepare.

    And yet they're still running round the night before buying flowers from the all night garage.
     
    • Like Like x 2
  12. sirbhp

    sirbhp LE Book Reviewer

    i did regs an the ta so why do i have to buy my own medals ?
     
  13. i think i will buy a few nice bling medals with my bounty and have a walt fest at v. cheers easy.
     
  14. When do we get paid this month?

    When does bounty go in?

    Can my training year be extended because it's only been like, a year?

    I've been in 4 years, do I qualify for the new gong?

    Have you ever killed anyone?

    Can I go on a promotion course despite being downgraded?

    Officer recruiting. Discuss.

    OR recruiting. Whinge.

    When do I get PCS?

    Can we tuck PCS in (R Sigs(V) only)?

    Why does my brew taste funny and dare I voice this question (watchkeepers only)?

    Why do the regs hate us?

    I would go but I've twisted my sock. Ski trip, yeah, it's fine for that.

    TOSCA is an Op tour.

    Can I skip TSC(A)+(B) as I was a reg (for 3 weeks)?

    Etc...

    Edited to derail the thread completely HAC, 4 PARA, 21 SAS(R), 23 SAS(R) and in no particular order SF, no role, Airborne Gods, Balls.

    In your own time, go on.
     
    • Like Like x 4