• ARRSE have partnered with Armadillo Merino to bring you an ARRSE exclusive, generous discount offer on their full price range.
    To keep you warm with the best of Merino gear, visit www.armadillomerino.co.uk and use the code: NEWARRSE40 at the checkout to get 40% off!
    This superb deal has been generously offered to us by Armadillo Merino and is valid until midnight on the the 28th of February.

The Afghan Footballer

Kenny Dalglish (other managers are available) watches a young Afghan playing football in Kabul and is so impressed that he arranges for him to come over to the UK to play.

2 weeks later Liverpool are 4-0 down away to Chelsea with just 20 mins left to play.
Dalglish gives the young Afghan striker a chance and on to the pitch he goes.
The lad is a sensation and scores 5 goals in 19 mins and Liverpool with the game (its ok its in the jokes section)
When they come out of the changing rooms the lad phones his mum to tell her about his first day playing English football.

'Hi mum, guess what I scored 5 goals in 19 minutes and we won the match, everybody loves me the media are all after a piece of me.

Wonderful says his mum, Let me tell you about my day, your father got shot in the street, your sister was raped on here way home from the market and I was ambushed and robbed on the way to the mosque your brother has joined an armed gang and all of this while you were having such a great time.

The young lad is very upset. 'What can I say mum I'm very sorry'

'Sorry! SORRY!!!' says his mum
'Its your fault we came to liverpool in the first place'

Latest Threads