Thank God it isn’t serious

It appears I’ve had Mumps for the past 15 years. What a relief!
And this is why you should be vaccinated.....People forget in a bloke mumps can be a pretty serious issue especially after puberty.
I think that’s more a case of flumps than mumps.

That isn't the Flumps......this is the Flumps.



Who knew??? You could contract mumps simply by over eating!!!

Well I never!!!
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Looks like they caught the Mong rather than Mumps.


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I had the mumps as a kid, during the summer holidays! Who do I see for compensation?
I got mumps last year, was working night clubs as photographer for extra income

They had a strop because I didn't want to infect anyone, and didn't want to take on any work until I wasn't contagious
I had the mumps as a kid, during the summer holidays! Who do I see for compensation?
Maybe you should be grateful instead, because did those mumps prevent you from sampling Pontins?
I had mumps as a nipper, but it was during school session, so that was all right. :thumright:
Had the mumps at I3. The swellings by the jaw hurt like hell and on one side the swelling took many months to disappear completely. Didn't seem to affect the old bollocks though.
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I played a flanker on my mum once, pretended to be ill so I didn't have to go to school. Miraculously got better in the afternoon so I could go out and play with my mates.

Ffwd 2 weeks.. Mum, I'm poorly.

Mum. Whatever, get to school you little shit.

2 hrs later... School. Ring ring. Oh hello Mrs, come and collect your diseased child, the little shit has chicken pox!


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The morning Apollo 12 was due to moonwalk. "I don't feel ower grand." "Stay at home. You're on your own." Result.

Crew whip out the camera, point it at the sun, burn it out. Mission ruined as a televisual event. Bastid! "God, why did you do this to me?"

"You think that's it? Here, have a grumbling appendix on me."

Phoned the GP surgery. Luckily me mum had worked as a nursing auxiliary with Doctor Forbes during the war, he came out to me, diagnosed. The pain had stopped doubling me up. Nothing to do here. "Don't be surprised if it flares up again in the next six months.'

50 years on, I still haven't dared pull a sickie.

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