Teenager finds bat asleep in bra

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by pvtePile, Jul 9, 2008.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. A teenager who thought movement in her underwear was caused by her vibrating mobile phone found a bat curled up asleep in her bra.

    Abbie Hawkins, 19, of Norwich, had been wearing the bra for five hours when she plucked up the courage to investigate.

    When she did, she found a baby bat in padding in her 34FF bra. The hotel receptionist said she was shocked but felt bad for removing the "cuddly" bat.

    "It looked cosy and comfortable and I was sorry for disturbing it," she said.

    She was sitting at her desk at work when she decided to investigate the strange movements in her underwear.

    "I put my hand down my bra and pulled out a cuddly little bat.

    Perhaps I should have left it there and given it a good home
    Abbie Hawkins

    "That shocked me very much at the time, but it scuttled off under the desk into the dark. I was shaking from head to toe.

    "It looked quite cosy and comfortable in there so it was quite rude of me to take it out.

    "When I realised it was a bat the first thing that occurred to me was how did it get in there.

    "I felt quite sorry for it. Perhaps I should have left it there and given it a good home.

    "I did not notice anything as I put my bra on. The night before I had had one or two drinks and I was getting ready quickly.

    "The bra was in my drawer but it had been on the washing line the day before.

    "When I was driving to work, I felt a slight vibration but I thought it was just my mobile phone in my jacket pocket."

    The bat was captured by one of her colleagues and released

  2. I often feel strange movements in my underwear, I wonder what's down there.

    34FF, why did it need padding?
  3. 34FF? You could have got a whole colony to nest in one of those!
  4. That reminds me of a bloke who realised he'd a gerbil lodged deep inside his colon. 'Realised' is probably the wrong word as he'd instructed his boyfriend to place it in there before they indulged in a mutual masturbation and heavy petting session.
  5. Wonder if she would have left it there if it had chewed on her nip and given her a shot of rabies????
  6. old_fat_and_hairy

    old_fat_and_hairy LE Book Reviewer Reviews Editor

    As bats are a protected species, and as i am a trained and qualified bat handler(well, actually a bra handler) I should have been called to remove it.
    However, as it was in Norfolk, I'm surprised she found it unusual in any way.

    Edited for bad spelling caused by over-excited fingers.
  7. Hands up who else was expecting a picture of a fat bird with huge funbags??? Scary teeth though!!!
  8. Oooh... couldn't you just have fun with those....
  9. I though she meant a baby mini bat, not a huge horrible plastic one :D
  10. Mobile phone my ARRSE.......she was expecting to find her rabbit in her bra! ;)

    I'd give her one!
  11. Bat? What bat?


  12. Top Nork,s though
  13. She looks more of a vampire than the bat. Nice chebs, though, wonder how the bat survived under all that weight?
  14. old_fat_and_hairy

    old_fat_and_hairy LE Book Reviewer Reviews Editor

    Never mind the bat. There is room in there for stumps, balls and a complete set of whites.