teacher

Discussion in 'Sick Jokes' started by phil245, Sep 6, 2011.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. phil245

    phil245 LE Book Reviewer

    A teacher with a class of 6 year old's is walking round her classroom, when she see's that there is a puddle on the floor by one of the desks. She asks " who did this ?" A little girl shyly says " it was me, miss" The teacher says " Why didn't you put your hand up?" The little girl says " I did, but it ran through my fingers"
     
  2. Teacher is calling the register of her 7 year olds and when she gets to little Johnny she says,

    "Why weren't you in class yesterday?

    "I had to go with mum and dad when granny got burnt", replies little Johnny.

    "Wash she badly burnt?" enquires the teacher with concern.

    "Well Miss, they don't fcuk about at the cematorium!" :-D
     
    • Like Like x 1
  3. phil245

    phil245 LE Book Reviewer

    little johnny is sitting in class playing with ball bearings, when he drops two of them and they roll slowly to the front of the class. the teacher asks the class " who has got steel balls?" Little johnny says "Is it Superman"
     
  4. Teacher calls little Johnny and little Sussie's parents to school for 'inappropriate behaviour.

    When they arrive, Susie's parents start with, "What do you have to say for yoursel my girl?"

    "It's all Johnny's fault. He said I didn't have a nice bag, and I said he didn't have a nice pencil case, and he said I didn't have a skateboard, and I said he didn't have a new bike, and he said you don't have one of these and pulled his pee pee out!"

    "Well that's not fair," says Susie's parents to the teacher.

    "I know," said Susie, "Thats why I dropped my knickers and showed him my mini moo moo and told him with one of these I can get as many pee pee's as I want when I'm older!"
     
    • Like Like x 1
  5. phil245

    phil245 LE Book Reviewer

    Susie's mum goes round to see johnny's mum and says " I have just caught Susie and johnny playing Doctors and nurses" Johnny's mum says " Kids of their age are naturally curious about their body's Susie's mum says " Its not that he has taken her appendix out"
     
  6. Teacher in class says OK kids give me a 12 letter word...Little Johnny sticks his hand up and say's MASTURBATION teacher says My thats a mouthful...He says No Miss your thinking of BLOW JOB
     
  7. Little Mary comes home from school yelling "mummy mummy little Johnny had his Willie out in school today!"

    Mum asks "what was it like?"

    Mary says " like a peanut"

    Mum asks " what,really small?"

    Mary says " no it was salty!"
     
    • Like Like x 1