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Talking in the 3rd person.

I've always preferred the active voice, as in 'make me a nice cup of tea'. No ambiguity and a simple clear instruction. To oil the social wheels, one may add please as an addendum.
Or...

Would you like a nice cup of tea?

Yes.

So would I.
 
For a bit of variation, try "Charlie says this tea is gopping. Wazzock."

Then maybe Charlie will get something he likes.
Dunno about that, but I'm pretty certain Charlie will get what's coming to him...
 

Euclid

War Hero
What if you’ve got a violent split personality disorder with a smattering of schizophrenia? Talking in the third person would be normal.
 
Knew a man called Kenny. He always spoke to everyone including senior officers ( police) in the third person. He got away with a lot because of this but he also had lots of commendations and was in his last years of service, so maybe this was the reason for their tolerance.

Memorable sayings were:

Kenny is scared.
Kenny is leaving.
Kenny wants......usually crisps or a pie.
Kenny thinks you are a fucking twaaaat.
Kenny wants to go hooooome.
Kenny is angry.

Kenny says fuck this.

There were others but can't remember them.

The funny thing ( and he kept me laughing for years) was that when it was pointed out that speaking in the third person was a sign of lunacy, he would just say:" I am not a lunatic, but Kenny thinks you are a fucking twaaaat."
 
Due to boredom, I keep thinking of ways to entertain myself and pass the time. The majority of my work, involves baiting and goading the long haired CO, as it is top sport!

My latest game, is talking in the 3rd person. "Charlie really likes this cup of tea". She is getting to screaming/apoplectic level, which is nice.

Have you ever met/worked with/known a complete knob jockey who spoke in this way?

Charlie4 would like your stories!

Dave isnt sure what to say about this thread..
 
There's some cnut singer who recently demanded that HE be a them or a they. At that point the media should have held firm and said if you want the publicity you so obviously crave, you're a fucking HE.

Pandering to this fucking nonsense is insanity, and we still expect to be able to teach kids decent grammar and English when you can pick and chose your pronouns to suit your mood and peccadillo.

Utter shitcunts, the lot of them.
 
Knew a man called Kenny. He always spoke to everyone including senior officers ( police) in the third person. He got away with a lot because of this but he also had lots of commendations and was in his last years of service, so maybe this was the reason for their tolerance.

Memorable sayings were:

Kenny is scared.
Kenny is leaving.
Kenny wants......usually crisps or a pie.
Kenny thinks you are a ******* twaaaat.
Kenny wants to go hooooome.
Kenny is angry.

Kenny says **** this.

There were others but can't remember them.

The funny thing ( and he kept me laughing for years) was that when it was pointed out that speaking in the third person was a sign of lunacy, he would just say:" I am not a lunatic, but Kenny thinks you are a ******* twaaaat."

Reminds me of the only credible character in Braveheart:

 
Is 'One' simply more formal that 'I' or 'You'? Is the passive tense in technical writing simply to focus on the object and not the person? The circuit was constructed and not John constructed the circuit.

Ref. use of the word 'one', it simply means a person, not one person in particular ergo not 'I', 'you' or 'he/she', just any person in general.
Eg. When confronted by a pmt wife at high tension, one simply agrees with everything that she says and all will be well.
The word 'you' is often inappropriately used instead especially in relation to the speaker's personal experience thus they state that I would think or react in the same way that he/she did which is tediously annoying.
To believe that it is in any way 'formal' language is erroneous as we all use it in everday language as in the words 'someone', 'anyone' and 'no-one'.


Sent from my karzi while losing several pounds
 
Last edited:
Ref. use of the word 'one', it simply means a person, not one person in particular ergo not 'I', 'you' or 'he/she', just any person in general.
Eg. When confronted by a pmt wife at high tension, one simply agrees with everything that she says and all will be well.
The word 'you' is often inappropriately used instead especially in relation to the speaker's personal experience thus they state that I would think or react in the same way that he/she did which is tediously annoying.
To believe that it is in any way 'formal' language is erroneous as we all use it in everday language as in the words 'someone', 'anyone' and 'no-one'.


Sent from my karzi while losing several pounds
I was taught that the use of "one" should be avoided because it showed moral cowardice on the part of the user. If somebody is going to cast aspersions, they should have the courage to name names.
 

O Zangado

War Hero
What about One makes a nice cup of tea, or Tea was made and satisfied all those that consumed it?

Is 'One' simply more formal that 'I' or 'You'? Is the passive tense in technical writing simply to focus on the object and not the person? The circuit was constructed and not John constructed the circuit.

An apparently successful tryst from a few years back...

W. Connolly: "One loves one"
P. Stephenson: "One loves one too".
W. Connolly: "One would like to give one one".
P. Stephenson: "One would like to give one one too".

OZ
 
I was taught that the use of "one" should be avoided because it showed moral cowardice on the part of the user. If somebody is going to cast aspersions, they should have the courage to name names.

I see your point but that would, surely, only apply if one were avoiding reference directly to or implicating oneself or another person/persons.


Sent from my karzi while losing several pounds
 

Cold_Collation

LE
Book Reviewer
Screen Shot 2018-02-13 at 12.41.06.png
 
I was taught that the use of "one" should be avoided because it showed moral cowardice on the part of the user. If somebody is going to cast aspersions, they should have the courage to name names.

Charlie hasn't heard that before, but it makes sense, and he likes it.

This thread is progressing slightly better than Charlie expected.
 

BratMedic

LE
Book Reviewer
Slight thread drift, but 'talking' and 'sport' ...

Are you from 'Oop North?'

When dealing with officious, 'clipboard' (mainly public sector) types who have been on all the courses on how to handle difficult situations and are so terribly adonyne and bland, but also perfectly Pc right to the end of their little tippy toes.

I amuse messel' if I'm bored by chucking an odd 'Luv' into the conversation....
Bloke or Lass, it doesn't really matter...
You can tell if you've got a bite by the pause and intake of breath..
Of course being a thick peasant from a Northern heartland scarred by industrial decline, the 'Luv' concerned is of course a colloquially correct, traditional and friendly form of address in these parts.

Those under 30 bite best, as do the higher echelons of Plod (don't ask) or Civil Service.
If one can hook one of a Southern demographic, they seem to be least able to conceal their frustration..
I know it's sad, but it's usually more fun than talking to the cows most days.

I nearly called up one of our guys when he used ‘luv’ in an interaction with a MoP the other day.

Forced myself to walk away as I realised I had been infected by the ‘pc’ virus and gave myself a strict talking to.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 

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