Talk Talk

If you havn't already signed up with them, save your self the bother (spelt with a big 'B'!)
What an absolute shower of shite they are.

We signed up when a "rep" came walking up my drive one evening and sounded like he was doing some sort of internet poll.
I invited him in and it all sounded very attractive, saving us loads of money compared to BT, faster download speeds, UK call centres, all the bollox. Well even my missus bought his spiel (and she is one canny chick), so we signed up.
They would contact BT to cancel, and do all the admin bit. And a few days later the new router and bits arrived in advance of our "live" day. Now this should have rang alarm bells, as their router was not as good looking as BTs. Call me Mr Pickie, but I know what I like.

Anyway when we get on due to their "Homesafe" security we have no access to social sites, Facebook, Youtube etc and definately no porn, whats a guy to do?
Despite my wife being on the phone for hours to their technical dept, (still talking to Asian folks so does it matter where their call centre is located?) they could not solve the issue. They had never come across the situation before. We decided to cancel after 3 weeks and go back to BT and got a cheaper deal from them.

Talk Talk thought they would chance their arm and try to charge us £243 for breaking the contract early. And during this conversation they developed technical difficulties with their phone line. When the "consumer rights act" was mentioned they rapidly started back pedaling.

In a nutshell if they come a calling, tell 'em to FUCK OFF. Politely ofcourse mind.

Deleted 20555

I had an experience with these cunts...

I changed my number - informed them and had my service changed to the new number - all fine and dandy - then a month later they cancelled my service.

Two days talking to people in fucking Bangladesh and Phillipines and I am told oops - they made a mistake - if I want to continue with them I have to take out a new contract and wait two weeks for a connection.

Screw that - went to O2 - got 10 months free yadda yadda - very happy until...

Collection notice from Talk alk arrives stating I owe them £68 for cancelling my contract.

Write back telling them I didn't cancel it - they did and sent them a copy of their email where they confirmed they had cancelled the contract by mistake.

Month passes - fucking collection agency informs that I now owe them £150 for cancelling contract, collection etc or the bailiffs will be arriving - do the whole song and dance again and it goes quiet - month later second fucking collection agency starts phoning me twice a day and sending threatening letters.

Wrote to the ombudsman with copies of everything - month later grovelling phone call saying that they were terribly sorry - demanded they put it in writing as follows...cunts.

Further to our recent telephone conversation, I am writing to confirm our agreement to resolve your complaint.

My understanding of your complaint is as follows:

Due to our error we had disconnected your broadband service and the new order for the broadband you tried to place never went through and we are extremely sorry about that.

In order to resolve the situation, my proposals are to take the following actions:

The outstanding balance on the account of £69.37 will be waived for you. I will also contact CARS DCA to remove your details from there system so you don't receive any further correspondence from them.

As we have agreed, these actions will resolve your complaint. If you feel there are any remaining areas of concern, please let me know. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to resolve your complaint.


Kalpesh Parekh
Manager, Chief Executives Office
Talk Talk
Stay as far as you can away from them no matter what they say to you.
We signed up with them, when things went tits up, we spent many an evening talking bollocks to our colonial cousins in India.

We finally got a computer programmer friend to try to find out why we couldn't get on the net, for a fucking month..... One and a half hours later, we were back to the same punjab cunt we started off with in the first place!

Complete and utter cunts...... avoid.
Sounds exactly like those useless shitheads at Virgin Media.


We have family on Talk Talk, their (lousy) customer services are not UK and their download rates are abysmal. It seems difficult to avoid unscrupulous hard nosed practice in any internet or phone deals. Cancellation fees are apparently still due if these companies mis-sell, or fail to deliver, and even when the provider cancels the contract. They're all at it, mobile providers, Broadband, the lot of them. Contracts are often for up to two years and they insist on their contract fees, up until the end of the cancelled contract. Don't pay and you get collection notices, then CCJs and a trashed credit record. Lose-lose situation. We are still charged, and in some cases they want up to £1000. Plusnet (Plusnet *|* Home & Business Broadband Internet Access & Phone Services UK) is one of very few to offer a genuine "no contract" option and we're looking at sticking two fingers up to the big hitters.

No-Contract Broadband Deals | Compare with
You get what you pay for, talktalk are an absolute shower. We get sent out to install lines for them and they can't even tell us the phone number we are working on.
Agreed, we had Talk Shite once, never again. On the up side its nice when some scrote trys the sales pitch whilst your out shopping and you get to use the good old one liners on them, I had your service once mate but I gave it up to shove cocktail sticks in my eyes, bloke asked why, Mrs 24A butts in ........ Because it's shite mate! We now look forward to abusing them every time.
I had an experience with these cunts...
(snipped for brevity)
Stay as far as you can away from them no matter what they say to you.
Had a similar experience with this shower of useless cunts. Make damn sure you check your credit record to see if the bastards entered a default against you whilst they were the ones busily fucking up the whole thing.

Here's a quick and easy few points to remember when dealing with these fucking wastes of space:

1. Shit service.
2. Shit equipment.
3. Shit customer support.
4. Dirty tricks brigade operating in the background.


Book Reviewer
We signed up when a "rep" came walking up my drive one evening...
Shoot the fucking dogs. Times are hard and one cannot be feeding lazy attack dogs. Shoot the hairy fuckers and feed them to the pigs. Contrary to posh boy Guy Richies bollocks in his film Snatch, pigs will eat alsatians, their fur, their long tails and their puckered little arseholes. No problem.

I really do not have a clue who is responsible for our Broadband and our phones. I would imagine it is the family accountant. Or possibly the housekeeper. Dunno. I noticed one of the under-keepers had one of those iPad things. Maybe it is him?


Kit Reviewer
Plusnet are actually BT if you did not know. Only know this as my mate is high up in BT so I think I may change as my bills are not that cheaper under Talk Talk
These chancers come round the doors every six months or so with some shite about how the local exchange has been taken over by them and if you transfer everything will be free and at hyper speed etc.

As soon as I've twigged that the young twat with the stupid haircut is from TalkTalk they get the bum's rush (I don't buy on my doorstep anyway), which is usually countered with the really shit/guaranteed to get your back up doorstep marketer line "how much are you paying now and do you like paying more for your phone line?" to which I cheerily reply "yes, goodbye".

Cunts. Avoid.
Used to have Talk Talk (aka Tiscali) broadband. Bunch of utter toss, tech support in some flip flop country or another. can't understand them and they don't know what they're doing anyway. Kicked them well into touch a couple of years ago. Been with Orange ever since. Same shit tech support, but goes wrong a fraction as often. Better more consistent D/L speeds, alleged unlimited d/l's with fair use policy, which must be quite generous as I've not managed to get it to kick in yet. I'm pretty convinced all bb providers are shite, but Orange do seem less bad tbf.


Book Reviewer
Sounds exactly like those useless shitheads at Virgin Media.
Virgin have always been reliably spot-on for me over ten years (admittedly Telewest originally) and four houses.

Always appear when they say they will, the Geordies on the phone are helpful and even when you get punted randomly to India for broadband problems, they're not too bad.
Yep. In my experience Virgin Media Broadband is pretty good. TV's a rip off though. We only use about half a dozen of the available channels and the rest are pointless drivel. TV's going soon anyway, as the Freeview is equally as good/shit for the amount of TV we actually watch. With what we save when we've binned the TV bit we can probably buy boxed sets of New tricks/Waking the Dead/Silent Witness, which is all the missus seems to watch anyway.
Best and most underrated band of the 80's. Bar none.

Mark Hollis. Musical genius.

Back on topic ;-)
Best and most underrated band of the 80's. Bar none.

Mark Hollis. Musical genius.

Back on topic ;-)
Yep, I thought this was about that GREAT band. Got all excited, thinking about witty things I would type about drunken sessions listening to suchlike bands and all it's about is.....

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