Swapsies.

Ravers

LE
Kit Reviewer
Book Reviewer
#1
So it appears I may have bitten off a little more than I can chew.

Last year we acquired a big fuck off old house in the country. It needed a fuck load of work but I thought I'd be able to crack it all eventually.

I was wrong.

It appears my building/painting and decorating/plumbing/electricianing skills aren't quite as good as I thought, the place is falling down.

I'm about halfway done but it's taking over my life and I just can't be arsed anymore. It's a massive job.

Did I mention the house is really big and really old? Well it is.

So what I'm looking for is a skills swap.

I need a decent decorator/plasterer, a good sparky, plumber and gardener to have a crack at a bit of my house and try and make a small dent.

In return you'll receive absolutely zero money, not a penny.

What I can offer is the following:

A bed in a stunning grade II* listed manor house,
Decent scran,
As much Homebrew as you can drink,
Free fishing in a really really nice river full of trout,
Guitar lessons,

Apparently, I'm also reasonably good at fixing gats so I'll also offer some top notch gunsmithery if that's your thing.

Anyone fancy it?

Post your swapsies here.
 

ugly

LE
Moderator
#2
Look up Suburban bushwacker he's fucked my plumbing plenty but he's a nice chap and good company!

Sent from my BlackBerry 9780 using Tapatalk
 

Ravers

LE
Kit Reviewer
Book Reviewer
#4
I have a very particular set of skills that make me a nightmare for people like you.
Do you fancy learning the opening chords to a few Oasis songs?

If so, you maybe my man.
 

Ravers

LE
Kit Reviewer
Book Reviewer
#6
Give me the drink I'll prescribe you a shit load of drugs so you don't give a fuck.
Drugs are one of the few things I'm sorted for.

A minor lottery win and some shrewd investments during my MDMA days means I shouldn't have to worry about gear for a while.

Cheers anyway.

You sorted?
 
#9
I can mow a lawn in crooked lines, if that's any good to you.
 
#10
So it appears I may have bitten off a little more than I can chew.

Last year we acquired a big fuck off old house in the country. It needed a fuck load of work but I thought I'd be able to crack it all eventually.

I was wrong.

It appears my building/painting and decorating/plumbing/electricianing skills aren't quite as good as I thought, the place is falling down.

I'm about halfway done but it's taking over my life and I just can't be arsed anymore. It's a massive job.

Did I mention the house is really big and really old? Well it is.

So what I'm looking for is a skills swap.

I need a decent decorator/plasterer, a good sparky, plumber and gardener to have a crack at a bit of my house and try and make a small dent.

In return you'll receive absolutely zero money, not a penny.

What I can offer is the following:

A bed in a stunning grade II* listed manor house,
Decent scran,
As much Homebrew as you can drink,
Free fishing in a really really nice river full of trout,
Guitar lessons,

Apparently, I'm also reasonably good at fixing gats so I'll also offer some top notch gunsmithery if that's your thing.

Anyone fancy it?

Post your swapsies here.
"Today's illegal Immigrants"

Still wanted by the government, they survive as state spongers. If you have a problem...if no one else can help...and if you can find them...maybe you can hire...Jovic, Romanov, Vladimir and Jelena


Coat...Taxi..
 

Ravers

LE
Kit Reviewer
Book Reviewer
#12
"Today's illegal Immigrants"

Still wanted by the government, they survive as state spongers. If you have a problem...if no one else can help...and if you can find them...maybe you can hire...Jovic, Romanov, Vladimir and Jelena


Coat...Taxi..
Christ.

Just accept it mate, your daughter is marrying a bloke from Kiev.
 
#13
Christ.

Just accept it mate, your daughter is marrying a bloke from Kiev.
She's already been warned off,

besides I've got more multi nationality Civvy workers than You can shake a stick at where I work ;-)
 

Ravers

LE
Kit Reviewer
Book Reviewer
#14
She's already been warned off,

besides I've got more multi nationality Civvy workers than You can shake a stick at where I work ;-)
Good for you.

The last ethnic that came to where I live in Cumbria was via a slave ship.
 
#15
I'd be up for general duties; my later appraisals were along the lines of 'works well under close supervision'. But if you need a general dogsbody, and I can clear it with Mrs Chef, I'm up for it. PM details and timings.
 

jarrod248

LE
Gallery Guru
#16
Drugs are one of the few things I'm sorted for.

A minor lottery win and some shrewd investments during my MDMA days means I shouldn't have to worry about gear for a while.

Cheers anyway.

You sorted?
I'm not doing any manual work that's why we have tradesmen.
Don't say I didn't offer to help.
 
#17
jarrod248 said:
I'm not doing any manual work that's why we have tradesmen.
Don't say I didn't offer to help.
Isn't that the point? Who wants tradesmen when the network of fine Arrsers with years of experience and very expensive re-settlement courses can do equally better(ish) for a few pints of the Old Undrinkable? Help on an Army pension... priceless.
 

Grumblegrunt

LE
Book Reviewer
#18
where is this thatched shed then?

I don't mind helping a man out if its not 300 miles away - I was a kitchen fitter until I moved sarf 10 years ago so am multiskilled.

anyway its more fun destroying another mans pride and joy :)
 
G

goatrutar

Guest
#20
If anyone parks illegally on your front lawn, I can tow them away. Provided of course you flew me over and someone in the UK could lend me a tilt tray for about 10 minutes. Aside from that, me and power tools aren't usually a safe mix.
 

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