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Swap advice needed.

Had to go to a different pub the other day. Nice pint of Doombar, settle back, scan the gaff, all appears OK. There's the gents, there's the tarts, WAIT! what's that? Disabled babies changing rooms. Bloody hell. Rush home, what've I got? Ah yes, electric lawnmower, that'll do. Rush back to pub, game on I thought. Well to cut a long story short, I sat there looking hopeful, waving my mower, grinning and dribbling, 'til closing time. Not a bite! FFS.
What am I doing wrong? Do people realise the mowing season is over? Should I use a different bait for swaps? Will I have to go back to "surprise adoptions"?
Any help would be appreciated.

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