Survivalist sex!

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Tartan_Terrier, Jan 11, 2006.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. No, I only do fit birds.

  2. Yes, you dont look at the mantlepiece when you re poking the fire.

  1. I was having a chat with one of my friends the other day, when we got onto the subject of ugly women. Now he denies ever having slept with an ugly woman, though I can't see how anyone can be a gunner for ten years and not do a munter at least once.

    I must admit I've never seen him with an ugly bird, but then again he's been married for most of the time I've known him, so I don't think that can be called proof.

    Personally, I'm more of a survivalist. You remember them, those insane yanks who spent most of the eighties preparing for the apocalypse. The idea being that they would be prepared before the emergency and ensuing panic.

    For me going after the uglies early in the evening saves all the last minute panic and possible disappointment. The only major drawback is the embarassment if someone you know sees you.

    Even so I must admit that nothing I've done recently comes any lower on the scale than mildly embarassing, though I'm not sure if this is due to a raising of my embarassment threshhold, or if I'm going after a better class of munter nowadays.

    So are there other survivalists out there?
  2. In the dark, lying down. They are all the same. Ok, it may help to be well p1ssed at the same time.
  3. Go ugly early.
  4. After that, things can only improve. Possibly.
  5. Play it right you can crack an 'ugly early' round the back by the bins, return to the bar/oppos continue slurping and possibly pick up a quality bird at 0200 as you are the least desperate looking bloke in the place.

  6. as long as theyre female and got a pulse theyre fair game
  7. msr

    msr LE

    Or go ginger early, to prevent a rush :)

  8. You ain't lived until you shagged a pig!!! :p (Not the animal farm type mind!!)
  9. Was that one of the rules painted on the side of the barn? :D
  10. You've taken that too far!
  11. harsh. Or am I the only one to have gone through a redhead phase? (sober)...
  12. Yes, the only thing you should go through redheads with is your sword
  13. and I take it you don't mean your pork sword.
  14. I've never done one myself, but I can't honestly say that I wouldn't.
  15. Standards? What the hell are those?