Surprise Holiday Souvenirs - What did you bring home?

#1
I've just got back from Spain after three weeks in the sun, soaking up Spanish culture etc.
I don't usually bother with souvenirs as they are usually all a load of cheap chav tat.

This time though I brought home a blobby knob!

Has anyone else had a surprise souvenir!
 

old_fat_and_hairy

LE
Book Reviewer
Reviews Editor
#2
A rather useful and quite attractive child from Portugal?
 
#5
Went to Normandy a few years ago on a recce for a forthcoming battlefield tour of the American beaches (for army educational purposes) and brought back a rock from the Omaha beach (as one does). Kept it in my shed for a year before it started to crumble and saw it had a US grenade inside it (thought it was heavy) it was not primed (still had the wooden bung in it). Silly I know but what a find. Had it emptied and still have it.
 
#6
Not really a holiday - out in Libya dealing with <cough> "cheeky stuff" - took home a brand new, (70 year old) small oil can with a long spout and a pumpy thing near the handle* I found on what looked like a Brit/Aussie Div Maint Area circa 1940-41. Gave it to my ex REME brother-in-law and warned him if that he polished it up, a Big Fcuk Off Reccy Mech will pop out and hit him with a copy of EMERS.

*Help me out here guys.....Cans, Oil, 1 pint, Soldiers for the use of?
 
#7
went to Nord Iron once, came back with a wheelchair, Oh how we all laughed. :)
 
#8
Came back from Kyrgyzstan in 99 with a set of cavalry whiskers and a small rock.

Came back from California in 2000 with a dose and the eternal friendship of some doris (not in that order, and one soon cancelled out the other).

Came back from Sierra Leone 6 years ago with an extra hole in my arrse.

Came back from Italy this year with a selection of Christian Democrat campaign posters.

I must be slowing down...
 

Alsacien

LE
Moderator
#9
cernunnos said:
I've just got back from Spain after three weeks in the sun, soaking up Spanish culture etc.
I don't usually bother with souvenirs as they are usually all a load of cheap chav tat.

This time though I brought home a blobby knob!

Has anyone else had a surprise souvenir!
Were you not trying to explain away crabs the other month :?

You are a bit of medical disaster area in that department, are you a condom tester for a crap brand or something :?
 
#10
Yes indeed. My list of excuses was getting a bit thin then. My newest contagion has not done much for my credability as a faithful husband.

Still if she doesn't like it she can always f'uck off like the other four did!
 
#11
brought back from holiday in the states some ,, pine cone seeds from the f,,off big trees that grow there,,,so in 200 years time people will wonder why theres a 200 ft wide pine tree in the middle of germany,,,,,he he he ....
 

Alsacien

LE
Moderator
#12
cernunnos said:
Yes indeed. My list of excuses was getting a bit thin then. My newest contagion has not done much for my credability as a faithful husband.

Still if she doesn't like it she can always f'uck off like the other four did!
Ah, you are a marriage guidance counselor :D
 
#14
Alsacien said:
cernunnos said:
Yes indeed. My list of excuses was getting a bit thin then. My newest contagion has not done much for my credability as a faithful husband.

Still if she doesn't like it she can always f'uck off like the other four did!
Ah, you are a marriage guidance counselor :D
No not quite. I think life is to short and brutal to be f'ucked about by some bitch with a monk on. Men were not designed for monogamy. I'm a serial mongamist myself, that means I will only marry one woman at a time, it doesn't mean that I will only f'uck one at a time.

An extra c'ock would be useful though!
 
#16
cernunnos said:
Alsacien said:
cernunnos said:
Yes indeed. My list of excuses was getting a bit thin then. My newest contagion has not done much for my credability as a faithful husband.

Still if she doesn't like it she can always f'uck off like the other four did!
Ah, you are a marriage guidance counselor :D
No not quite. I think life is to short and brutal to be f'ucked about by some bitch with a monk on. Men were not designed for monogamy. I'm a serial mongamist myself, that means I will only marry one woman at a time, it doesn't mean that I will only f'uck one at a time.

An extra c'ock would be useful though!
Hey Cernunnos. Having observed your location, your number of marriages, your mischievous wit and your, obviously, itinerant wick-dipping, a thought occurred to me: Is your name Alex?
 
#17
PrincessBeatrice said:
Hey Cernunnos. Having observed your location, your number of marriages, your mischievous wit and your, obviously, itinerant wick-dipping, a thought occurred to me: Is your name Alex?
No. If you really want to know who I am you can check out the Thursday transport to the clinic in Bielefeld. I'll be the one waving a blobby knob at you!
 
#19
1994, went on a nice long holiday to the Adriatic. Came back with my P45.

F*cking Manning Control.
 
#20
Basrah, 2005, came back with Leishmanniasis - I think that's how you spell it.
 

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