Suppose we made old farts fight? (Come on the Spartans)

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by gobbyidiot, Sep 6, 2009.

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  1. I was watching a prog on the battle of Thermopylae. The Spartans who formed the spearhead - and who were doomed - all had male kids and so had done their bit for Sparta. The Swiss, of course, have their militia, and you only have to go back to the early 20th century to uncover a cultural expectation that citizens might have to fight.

    So............if we were a rational society we'd have a bloody big sign at Dover that said, "Welcome to Sparta". Every adult male would be (legally and culturally) obliged to stay fit and trained, and if we had to fight we'd send the 35-40 year olds first, then 40-50, and only then below thirty. By the time you've hit 35 you've at least had a "go". Most men would rather fight than see their sons fight.

    ...and I know it ain't going to happen.

    Because we're an island over-run by selfish lazy c*nts :cry:

    [It's that kind of Sunday, I fear].
  2. Fookin hell man, I would happily do so but I'd need a Scammel just to cart my belly around.
    I have to iron my shirts on a wok as it is, I doubt they do uniforms of any description in my size and shape....
  3. And because an ever increasing portion of our underclass have no relationship between fathers and sons, even where they know who they are.

    I wouldn't do it for purely expeditionary reasons, but to defend against invasion - too right.
  4. The bloody awful food the Spartans ate really helped them stay trim,and they got very little in their 'mess',Also most standard issue brits would find their boy's training (Agogee?) quite a challenge too!
  5. " For they had learned that the true safety was to be found in long previous training.
    And not in eloquent exhortations uttered when they were going into battle"

    of the Spartans 418bc
  6. Didnt buggery play a huge part in a young spartan's "apprenticeship"?
  7. The Greek forces at Thermopylae 300 Spartans,500 from Tegea, 500 from Mantinea, 120 from Orchomenus,1000 from Arcadia,400 from Corinth,200 from Philus,80 from Mycenae, along with 700 Boeotians and 400 Thebians

    Herodotus The Histories

    And only 299 Spartans got killed Aristodemus did a runner, with what was probably the first case of PTSD
  8. Volkssturm anyone?
  9. Now that is an interesting idea. As a paid up old fart I've got to agree and would add the spartan rule that until you've fought you don't get to breed.

    Before I loose the plot on this one I cannot resist quoting the poet Simonides. If I may say so, this has got to be the best soldiers' epitaph ever. Thanks for the opportunity!

    "Go tell the Spartans, stranger passing by, that here, obedient to their laws, we lie."

    Go carve that on a stone!
  10. I reckon that it's not such a bad idea. There must be a few million ex-squaddies in and around the UK who'd jump at the chance of another crack at things.

    I'd definitely be up for it, however, with certain conditions attached. I'd want an SLR with at least five of the ally LMG mags, plus there should be a certain weight limit for those taking part. I'm a former Medic and the thought of having to cart some huge, fat phuck on a stretcher fills me with dread. Also, I'd like a brace of them there pimped-up semi-autos (were they Desert Eagles?) to hang in drop-down holster jobbies on the tops of me thighs, like Angelina Jolie had in her Laura Croft role. Now that would be aces. :D :D :D

  11. HK9mm USP I think she had
  12. My lad is ready to go save me a fortune gobby git.
  13. I seem to recall that a Dad's Army type U.K. Defence Force was started back in the 80,s.With an age limit of maybe 50 and a reasonable fitness level mandatory this could still be a good idea,but no bloody S.L.R.'s I would much rather have an SA80A2 with UGL of course!
  14. Aye but think of the Health and Safety assesment.Risk assesment.Public liability insurance.Notification of the local authorities.WRVS on standby.Not mention the transport logistics.
    And of course the ambulance chasers coming along behind to pick over the mental trauma victims.
  15. Spartans: Harder than Them. Gayer than 3 Para Morters. Cooler than a whole big bag full of cool things. 8)