Summer Jobs and Teenagers.... Slavery Anyone?

#1
Teenager has asked that I allow him his freedom this summer rather than blasting his head every opportunity with comments like ‘Get a job you good for nothing sponging student!’

In fact he’s asked that I allow him his freedom to…

Spend time with friends (Sh*g)
Have his own recreational schedules (Take drugs)
Find himself (Take mind altering drugs)
Be his own man (I’m to pay for the drugs)
Learn his limitations (Get rat ARRSEd)
Stretch himself mentally (Comatose rat ARRSEd)
Socialise with new people (Find the best dealers in London clubs)
Expand his horizon (Become a drug dealer)
Investigates his friends working places and their jobs (Pimping, 1-0-1)
Look at small business ideas with friends (Pimping, advanced learning course)
Seeks to achieve government funding when his friends return to college (Sign on)

Anyone else with an older teenager got ideas how I can say with that degree of love and tenderness only a parent can muster when faced with a shitfaced lazyarrsed goodfornothing educatedbeyondreason and willingtotossitoffforawhile teenager that I'd rather not?

Yours, (The not bitter, and not slightly strung out, please help Dear God I can feel the flesh beneath my ever tightening hands as the life drains from him! :twisted: ) Beebs
 
#8
Send him abroad as a volunteer worker somewhere, not only might he actually find out theres more to life than he imagines already, but he'll be so far away that no matter what he gets up to *see sh*gging/drugs etc etc* you wont know about it so no point in worrying, i mean i joined up at 17 for christs sake so its probably time to let him off the lead now..... ;)
 
#10
At least its a trade, ;) we all learn from our mistakes as we get older, no amount of advice is going to change his mind, he has to have the experience to make his own decsions....

Now where did i read this i wonder ?:

"EVERYTHING! if you never experience life, how will they tell you you're dead? push it all the way and never look back!"
 
#11
Double_Duck said:
At least its a trade, ;) we all learn from our mistakes as we get older, no amount of advice is going to change his mind, he has to have the experience to make his own decsions....

Now where did i read this i wonder ?:

"EVERYTHING! if you never experience life, how will they tell you you're dead? push it all the way and never look back!"
I hate you! You're on his side! Grrrrrrrrrrrr :evil:

Beebs

NEXT!
 
#12
Lol, im not on anyones side but whats the alternative, tell him he cant do it ?, hows that going to work ?.
 
#13
Mine's 14 but now training him. All efforts to get him clean, tidy, punctual etc. failed until I introduced "performance related pay" He gets a generous allowance of £50 a week, but is fined a tenth of it for "misdemeanors" examples being: failure to get up, late for school run, untidy room, failure to use linen basket, failure to wash car (a weekly chore) smart mouthing me or his mother - the list goes on and my definition of misdemeanor is final.

Cost me bugger all for a while but now hitting me for about £10 a week but he's a pleasure to live with.
 
#14
Body piercer, tattooist?, they all normally work out of the same shop, can you get him some work experience if you`ve got a local one, might be worth ringing around, at least it`ll keep him off the streets and open his eyes a little :?
 
#15
Reverse Psychology?? Agree that it's probably all he's capable of and would be unlikely to
a. Get a proper job
b. Hack it in the Army
c. Hack it in the Navy
d. Hack it in the RAF

I tried leaving lots of route cards to Marseille around and interesting books on the Legion, but my little bugger never took the bait.
 
#16
Again reverse Psycjology, If you have always said "NO" then say "yes" tell him you will support his choice, let him go..... tell him that in "your house" you have certain rules, but he is free to do what he wants and you will completly support him in this - If he still decides to play the layaboutbodydrugdealing young chav then put him on show parade and confine him to camp! :)
 
#17
If you want to send him out to the Provinces to work as a "Soft Fruit and Tuber Production Technician" (fruit and Potato picker) then I can get him a job, and give him accomodation. (Which will cost all his wages, leaving only £10 a week for food and beer.)

I can also inspect said accomodation at 06:00hrs every morning, and make him cycle 4 miles to work while I go in the landrover. Much like the Army, except he'll be cycling not tabbing.

If you really want to give him life experience, I'm sure a job at the more "Grafter" end of Agriculture can be arranged.......6 months of that and he'll be screaming out for a 'proper' job! 8)

(I am actually being serious....but if he dicks around and I fill him in, i'm not liable.)
 
#18
blessed baby cakes said:
No, I'm from the Eastend of Glasgow you tit, I was 11 when he was born!
:lol: nice one Beebs

I've got a 18 yr old (step) daughter and it has been a bloody nightmare. Every telling off seems to be (in her eyes) a bullying case worthy of childline! :evil:
 
#19
Tell him you've booked him a coach ticket for a week away at a "holiday camp" as a treat



Wont know whats happening till he gets off the bus at Harrogate foundation college, signed up for a 4 year stint - go on, make a man out of him ;o)
 

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