Summer is here - Lardies cover up

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Gas Gas Gas, Jul 15, 2003.

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  1. Let it all hang out. To hell with the fatists

  2. Buy suitable clothing from

  3. Not go swimming near Japanese fishermen.

  1. Now that summer has arrived, am I alone in wishing that some of my fellow men & women would wear more clothes? I am not averse to seeing some nubile wench going along the pavement in skimpy attire commensurate with the hot weather conditions. What does puzzle me is why her fat friend thinks she can get away with the same dress state. Watching the Michelin man�s sister waddling along is not my idea of fun.

    Before our sisters-in-arms have a go at me for being (heaven forbid) sexist, I am also against those males sporting, not a six-pack, but a half a cellar from stripping off their tops.

    I know with the illness anorexia nervosa sufferers still see themselves as fat in the mirror when in fact they are only skin and bone. Is there a similar illness to explain how lardies look in a mirror and see either a sex kitten or stud according to their gender?
  2. What I'd like to know is,..... why do men seem to think they have the standard six pack,..... when in fact they look more like they've got a family pack! :?:

    I think men 'under-dressing' in the summertime, are the biggest culprits of all!

    1. Do they really believe we wanna see their disgusting fat gut hanging out left, right and centre? :?:

    2. Do they really believe that being covered in crappy substandard tattoos is alluring? :?:

    3. Why on earth do they insist on wearing shorts that are too small, hence when they bend over we assume it's a total eclipse? :?:

    I honestly feel that women (or most of them) know what does and doesn't look good on them during the summer months.... and if they're carrying extra weight, they allow for that, playing down their 'not so nice' bits!

    But men,....... they couldn't give a ratsáss! :roll:
  3. You are joking, surely! I was in central London this afternoon, and there were many revolting sights on display. Crop tops do not look good in size 22!
  4. Typical doris not reading the post! Gas stated it was a crime for birds and blerks. Don't get so bleeding defensive! And why is it that a bloke 'has a fat gut' and you say '.... and if they're carrying extra weight' when refering to a chick? You make it sound like she's just picked it up from Tescos by mistake as opposed to just being a salad dodging pie eater and as fat and lardy as the chap you described.

    2. Do they really believe that being covered in crappy substandard tattoos is alluring?
    Are you refering to women or men?

    Bleeding insecure woman! Can't live with em, can't bury them under the patio.

    S'ppose we're off to the naafi now!
  5. Saw one at the w/e, heavily pregnant, spider's web tattoo centered on the navel and a double belly piercing .. now what's that all about ? :roll:
  6. Report from recent Buckingham Palace press party:

    Mirror Editor Piers Morgan discussing sport with Prince William..

    Piers: Well, you must be admiring my amazing 6-pack?
    Wills: Um....keg more like.
  7. Lord Flasheart - don't get your knickers in a twist, will yer! I know Gas was referring to both sexes,...... I'm just saying that men are the biggest culprits for looking the most disgusting during the summer months!

    I don't make a habit of looking at other women,...... maybe that's because I'm NOT insecure about who/what I am and don't feel that I have to measure myself in any way, shape or form, against other women?

    Think about it!

    *Takes spade outta head and crawls back out from under the patio!*

    Bloody petty, insecure men! Sheeeesh :roll:

    ps: As for tattoos, don't like 'em on either sex,..... at all! :!:
  8. Ord_Sgt

    Ord_Sgt RIP

    Did one of us not call when we said we would or do you just hate men in general? :lol:
  9. Ord_Sgt - unfortunately, I only like 'real men'! :D

    Wassup..... you got tattoos and a fat belly or summink? :wink:
  10. Look splitarrse, get a grip, stop whinging and go and fetch me a beer. ;D

    I think all people of similar size to most sea going mammals need to cover up or be shot.
  11. Yep, lots of tats and a 24 pack belly. This makes me look "manly", whereas it makes you look like a fat old slag :D
  12. Ahhhh right, so 5ft 6ins and 8st 12lbs makes me a fat old slag does it?

    Enough of the 'old' my dear boy,... I'll slap your legs! :wink:

    Hang on,..... I'll just go an' get me snorkelling gear,..... I'm off to swim with Flipper forra while!!! :roll:
  13. Watch out for men with harpoons :lol:
  14. BriteGirkie, we've had this discussion before on this site. You say you only like 'real men'. Define that..... I suppose it means a 'six pack', bronze tan, flowing hair, etc. Now, forgive me if I'm wrong, but these men are few and far between, and the one's that are around are egotistic, muscle flexing, brain dead idiots with little or no personality. They like to talk about themselves, pose a lot and are never faithful cos they love the attention from the ladies. I think if you scratch the surface a little deeper on your 'average' bloke (with or without tattoos and a fat belly), you'll find someone sincere. Unless your vain and need to be seen hanging off some handsome, brick built shite house bloke who'll only be unfaithfully and break your heart (or has that already happened?). :p
  15. Errrrrrrrrrm, nope,..... I outgrew this type of man by the time I was 20 years old!

    Brain dead and no personality isn't my type either! (Plenty of those around though!)

    Yep, totally agree with ya there,..... this type hit on me all the time,...... I've got no time for them!

    They're never faithful because they're so insecure about themselves, they need to be falling from one woman to the next,...... that's their problem, not mine! Men like this have no part to play in my life thanks!

    Sorry,.... I just don't do tattoos and fat bellies. One or two discreet tattoos ain't too bad I suppose,....... but a fat belly? Nahhhhhhh, soz!

    I'm definitely the most unvain person ever! If I was vain I'd be happy to be seen with the 'six pack', bronze tan, flowing hair' men, wouldn't I?

    Couldn't care less whether he's got muscles or not,.... doesn't make him a man does it! Looks do matter though,..... doesn't make me 'shallow' at all,.... if I'm expected to look after myself, then I expect the same in return! Nothing wrong with expectations,.... but it works both ways!

    What heart? hahaha. Soz, seriously, yes I've had it broken,...... you pick yourself up and get on with life,.... but I won't fall into that trap again! :roll:

    Incidentally, the man I'm seeing at the moment has absolutely nothing to prove,..... he's successful, charming, bags of personality, healthy, fun and funny, not insecure, doesn't worry if his hair is outta place, doesn't have a fat belly, is reasonably goodlooking (ain't got a clue about tattoos, but I doubt he's got them)..... and he actually has time for me,.... that's exactly how I like men to be!