Such innocence . . . . ! Or a lesson in taking note of the kids homework.

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Fat_Cav, Sep 12, 2010.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. So I'm chilling on the sofa happy in the knowledge that my 6 yr old Cavlette is doing her homework.

    An hour earlier . . .

    "How do you spell 'Victorian' dad?"

    I oblige into Google and leave her to it. She's humming away and writing out lyrics to old songs they taught the kiddies in those days. Eventually, she asks if I want to hear her song so far as she's stopped becauseshe's run out of space and if I have another piece of paper.

    She starts reciting and I catch some words that don't compute from her angelic little mouth. 'Chebs' & 'fellate' to name a two.I look across at the monitor and is confronted by the words . . .

    "Can I have a go on your Clunge?"

    I grab the paper, quickly scan it and realise that she's just wrote out ¾ of the song below 8-O


    The scary thing is, if she hadn't of ran out of paper, she would have stuck it away in her school bag and handed it tomorrow for her Victorian theme lesson :omg:

    Incidentally i had to bite my lip to stop laughing and when i told her that she couldn't hand this one in, she started balling her eyes out.
    God, I'm a shit father

    Has any one else suffered a near miss of such levels?
     
  2. jim24

    jim24 Book Reviewer

    Tptally f@cking brilliant , eyes full of tears, LOL
     
  3. For a brief while, my sister kept chickens. The look on teachers face when one of the Daughters of Carrot happily announced she'd spent Saturday playing with Uncle Ian's cock was priceless.
     
  4. Auld-Yin

    Auld-Yin LE Reviewer Book Reviewer Reviews Editor

    You go to school with your daughter? Helping with homework is one thing but joining her in class is taking things a bit far.

    Did the teach give you detention for laughing at her 'face'?
     
  5. I like the intellectual challenge of Primary 2.
     
  6. I rember a test that was sent home from my daughters grade2 (primary two). It was one of those test where they have the kids draw a picture of a animal like a cow with the sound it makes and finaly what it was called. It was all good picture of a dog going woof then dog written down until it came to a picture of a cat the cat going meow then Bucking cat written next to it. Looking after the neighbours noisy cat might not have been a good idea.
     
  7. As in:

    Teacher:"Now class - who can tell me the name of your pet at home? Mary?"

    Little Mary: "my cat's called "Cooking" Fat", Miss."

    Teacher: "That's a strange name, Mary - why is it called that?"

    Little Mary: "Well Miss, my dad came home from the pub the night we got it, tripped over it in the dark and yelled...

    "WHO LEFT THAT COOKING FAT IN THE HALL?"
     
  8. You've had a narrow escape there, I think you'd have struggled to talk your way out of that one! Very funny just the same, though!
     
  9. Gremlin

    Gremlin LE Good Egg (charities)

  10. skid2

    skid2 LE Book Reviewer

    Thank you, Great speakers on this laptop. Ms Skid2 and wonderdog both looking horrified