Straightforward Crap Jokes! - The "I'll get me coat" Collection.

In the entrance area to the airframe and engine bay at Middle Wallop was a stomach churning graphic poster of the result of getting a ring caught and loosing a finger.. Had to come down after one of the admin girls took a look and passed out. To be fair I didn't blame her, made me queasy looking at it.. Put me off wearing rings to this day.
Must have been before or after my time,don't remember seeing that one , 80 to 87,jeez that was a long time ago !
 

Fang_Farrier

LE
Kit Reviewer
Book Reviewer
I remember a Ghurka Nukal "nine fingers" Gurung, 6GR.

Goalkeeper, put a ball over the bar, caught finger on a nail on cross bar. This however only cut it. Off to medical centre to get stitches.

One thing to remember when giving anaesthetic to a finger (or toe or most importantly a penis) is not to use an anaesthetic containing adrenaline or any other vasoconstrictor. If you do, it causes a tourniquet effect around the base of the finger and it loses its blood supply for a couple of hours.

Can you guess what the medic did not remember?
 

tiredoldhorse

Old-Salt
blasfemurs.jpg
 
The wife just rushed in, all smiles, saying she found her wedding dress and she can still fit in it...

...I haven't the heart to tell her it's the marquee.
 
The wife just rushed in, all smiles, saying she found her wedding dress and she can still fit in it...

...I haven't the heart to tell her it's the marquee.
At a local wedding it was heard in the best mans speech "Brides dress by Jessica, bridesmaids dresses by Midland Marquee".

The blokes all thought it was funny, not so the distaff side.
 
Been going to relationship counselling with the wife. The counsellor asked my to describe her favourite flower.

Apparently self-raising wasn’t the right answer.
 
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