Stinking rotten farts

In the collective wisdom that is ARRSE what combination(s) of food and drink produce the worst, or best if you're that way inclined, stinking fart?

I let out a rank one yesterday that I can only put down to a combination of whisky and cheap cheese and onion crisps.

As a side note my old tank commander died recently and his farts were indescribably rancid, he was also famous for his two minute farts (RIP Sneck @TARA ). Being cooped up with him in a closed-down Chieftain meant you didn't need any cam cream when you got out, you were already green.
 

hotel_california

LE
Book Reviewer
Your starting point should be real ale and experiment from there. From personal experience I thoroughly recommend "Fallen Acorn, Hole Hearted" plus any vegetable matter.
 
Pints of Guinness and pickled eggs....works for me. Mrs Pv forbids me to have them in the house at the same time.
 

NSP

LE
A dinner heavy on mushrooms and onion followed by a night in the pub on draught lager with a bacon and egg butty munchy-satisfier before bed (or next morning) of a Friday night always seems to ensure copious quantities of stench-laden emissions of a frequent, long, loud and with plenty of bass nature for me.
 
Red Heart rum, curried fish, peanuts and onions for texture and aroma, green peppers for volume and pressure.
 

jim30

LE
Beer, cheese and cabbage.

I once let out a fart on a bus that was so utterly rancid, so vile, that the woman next to me started shouting and getting very cross with her child for shitting his pants without telling her he needed the loo :)
 
The french onion soup with chili sherry I had last night is producing some rather obnoxious results right now. Thank goodness I have my own office.
 
Draught Bass. I am banned form even looking at it by SWMBO as I can render the whole house uninhabitable after as little as three pints.
 
Go to Morrison's bakery and get a couple of their chicken and ham hock pies, the pies are great but my fucking word the farts they produce are some of the most pungent I've ever lamped out. Combine that with the fact I have a daily protein shake after training and usually have Weetabix or Shredded wheats for breakfast you could facilitate a holocaust from my arse...
 
D

Deleted 146133

Guest
Eggs, eggs and more eggs. The aroma best savoured under the duvet the next morning. Marvellous. As an aside, why is it that men love the smell of their own farts but can't stand others?
 

AlienFTM

MIA
Book Reviewer
Your starting point should be real ale and experiment from there. From personal experience I thoroughly recommend "Fallen Acorn, Hoof Hearted" plus any vegetable matter.
Would have been apposite.

Some cunny funt(s) in Aberporth used to own boats called Pumpy Troosers and Hoof Hearted.
 

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