I rejoined after 8 years out a couple of years ago with the express intention of doing a tour. My name's been down for H16 since the start of the year but the GM, despite saying originally that they would support me, has now said that it shows a lack of commitment to work, effectively ending any prospect of promotion if I go. I'm 42, I have a good job with good prospects that I enjoy, I'm the only earner, my daughter goes to one of the best Prep schools in the country, and I have reluctantly decided to take my name off the list. My question is whether I can stay in the TA now knowing I've made the right decision for my family but have let the TA down? This was my only chance of a tour at my age and I find it difficult to keep the fitness up to a reasonable level due to the time I get home. Have I become everything the Regs hate about the TA, or can I justify staying in on the basis that you need numbers to make the training more interesting?