Funny enough I was in our little local shop just before Xmas, and some old bat in there was talking about the pedophile that's moved onto our estate.
Now, I know the bloke lost his wife to cancer about 2 years back, and he's a single father bringing up 3 teenage girls, and doing a good job I might add.
Anyway, I digress. When the old bird asked me if I was worried about a kiddy fiddler living so close by, I couldn't resist.
"Why would I be worried love, I'm 37 and fucking gopping, if he finds me attractive then quite frankly he's a pretty fucking shit pedophile."
The rest of the que had mixed reactions, few looks of disgust, 2 fellas behind me nearly popped holding back the tears, and some Jeremy Vile type just carried on staring at the till through his massive pupils.
Still, guess you had to be there.