Standards

Sleeping with another mans wife/husband

  • disgusting, immoral and wrong

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • no harm no foul / all's fair in love and war

    Votes: 0 0.0%

  • Total voters
    0
#1
I just want to get a feel for some irksome issues.

A mate of mine got trashed at a dinner night recently and ended up sleeping with a senior officer (different service) who was married. I thought this was pretty appalling and wondered what anyone else might think.

Same said mate also invited a private soldier into the mess last night for a beer to watch tv in the Officers Mess common room while they waited for a taxi.

Is it me or are standards slipping in this instance?
 
#2
Sleeping with another person's partner is wrong. Two people involved in doing this if discovered have potentially not just destroyed their own lifes but those of the spouses and children involved. There is a phrase 'an officer and a gentleman' i guess this doesn't apply here
 
#3
If an officer can't maintain the correct standards how is he/she supposed to ensure that the troops do, would they be able to sit there with a straight face and bollock the soldier knowing that they have commited the same offence?
 
#4
Slept with my Pl Comds wife when I was a (single) Cpl. She was a Lt in WRAC. In the marital bed too. Guess she hated him as much as I did. She also had the OPSO and Bn 2i/c.

Her marriage broke up when she made Capt before him despite being commissioned a year later.
 
#6
No it hasn't - that's a thread about pi$$ing in sinks - wally! :)
 
#10
Hmmm....

Not a particularly well defined metaphor though was it - in fact is wasn't even a metaphor - perhaps fetch your dictionary at the same time :p

And you're now admitting to shagging someone else's wife too?? Tut tut tut - it just isn't right!
 
#11
adyf, nothing personal here mate, this is more fun than the thread :lol:

metaphor
· n. a figure of speech in which a word or phrase is applied to something to which it is not literally applicable. a thing regarded as symbolic of something else.
– DERIVATIVES metaphoric adj. metaphorical adj. metaphorically adv.
– ORIGIN C15: from Fr. métaphore, via L. from Gk metaphora, from metapherein ‘to transfer’.

Pedantic I know, but one of my assignments on the CELTA course last year dealt with use of metaphor.

"Report writing"? Sorry, you've lost me there; if that's a metaphor, it's not that well defined either.

Over.....

.
 
#14
If both parties are separated when they sleep together they have already taken the decision to end the relationship, which puts a different spin on the situation
 
#15
adyf said:
Hmmm....

Not a particularly well defined metaphor though was it - in fact is wasn't even a metaphor - perhaps fetch your dictionary at the same time :p

And you're now admitting to shagging someone else's wife too?? Tut tut tut - it just isn't right!
Sharp bit of editing there! :roll:

Didn't say I had, just implied that most of us have. I've never pissed in the sink either.

.
 
#16
I'm a bit old fashioned on this one I'm afraid.

If someone can't keep it zipped and stay loyal to a person they have vowed to stay loyal to for the rest of their life then can you really trust them? What if there are children involved as well?

If something quite so important ,can be cast away light-heartedly then what happens when the chips are down?

I know you can look back at history and see plenty of examples of famous leaders doing the dirty, but it doesn't make it right. The bottom line is if you haven't got the self discipline to abstain then why get married in the first place?

Rant off!!!!

I had a cracking time through my twenties and into my thirties - and girlfirends came and went and often 'overlapped' but once I found Miss Right then I was happy to give up the chance of jumping the bones of the latest pretty thing in the regt.
 
#17
Got to agree with Bagpuss here. Am sick and tired of having to listen to the whingeing of certain female and male officers about how hard done by they feel, just because they've been caught playing away. Frankly, it stinks, if you haven't got the bollocks to end it properly, then you shouldn't be wearing a uniform.

As for playing away before marriage, crack on! I did - 6 years in germany on LOA. I then found someone I actually liked, and figured I had better marry her before anyone else did!
 
#18
Just because your not married, why does that give you the right to go behind your GF/BF's back? If you do it, why should you stop just because your married?

Hold on, just getting comfortable in my bomb shelter........

IMHO getting married isn't what it used to be, it is more a personal committment between two people, rather than the big public thing it used to be. It is so easy to get married, divorce, marry again etc etc (esp. in celebrity circles) than it is devauing the whole thing. Couples can live together and have the same status without actually being married. I supose my point is why bother with marriage today on the whole?

Before anyone asks, yes I am married, happily so with a baby. However, we got married as a personal affair, yet it seems to me that a lot of people get married, the whole big wedding etc etc, throw lots of money at it and then divorse or nearly divorse in a year! Surely you can't blame it all on the forces lifestyle (though it is used a lot).

Mish mash of a comment, for which I apologise! But I do know what I mean, I just hope someone else does.

OS
 
#19
Cheating stinks, no matter in which circumstances.

Why bother to make any kind of commitment (no, marriage is not required IMO) if not willing to stick to it?

Sh*gged my way more than happily through my twenties and early thirties, since having found Mr Fraulein (the latter sounds positively weird 8O ) have even more happily settled into the relationship. Exclusively so.

It's about standards, indeed, no matter if civviestreet or forces, doesn't make a dot of difference in my opinion.
 
#20
Oneshot,

Its funny but I think you are ahead of your times. In due course, the V&S are going to have to apply to non-married partners (if that is the right way of putting it) - if you have a relationship with someone's g/f it could be tested against the Service Test, too. We are happily engaging with 'life-partner' status which means that equality of treatment will see copping off with a 'significant other' will be treated as seriously as if it were a marriage.

My views on this are pretty straightforward. The club roolz is the club roolz. Deal with it, keep it in your trousers, go home and have a cold shower.

When the shit hits the fan you need to be able to trust the bloke who says 'follow me', and if you are the bloke saying 'follow me' you want to trust they'll be doing what you say.
 

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