squaddie wives !

#1
right, lets stir up some hornets ! why do squaddies get hitched to right f*cking horror stories ?.you see them in the ywca, local squaddie bars , the naafi with a gaggle of dirty unwashed feral children!..wearing leggings ,opened toe sandals with toes like pork sratchings , an arrse so big that you could park a bike in the cheeks !, what i mean is where are these women from? is there a part no for them ?.is there a village full of them ? . every camp has them usually employed as cleaners , working in naafis , so cmon fellow arrsers your comments / thoughts on this disturbing matter!
 
#5
threesend said:
right, lets stir up some hornets ! why do squaddies get hitched to right f*cking horror stories ?.you see them in the ywca, local squaddie bars , the naafi with a gaggle of dirty unwashed feral children!..wearing leggings ,opened toe sandals with toes like pork sratchings , an arrse so big that you could park a bike in the cheeks !, what i mean is where are these women from? is there a part no for them ?.is there a village full of them ? . every camp has them usually employed as cleaners , working in naafis , so cmon fellow arrsers your comments / thoughts on this disturbing matter!
Yes it's an interesting Georgian town known as Blandford. It's works like this. They hang about the 3 choughs long enough till some pissed up squaddies takes em round the back of tescos and gives em a quick scuttle up the drainpipe. They then go home and have meaningful loving sex with their brother who gets them preggers. The squaddie who's spunk is still dribbling out of her ass then becomes the fall guy as he was to drunk to remember doing this lady nevermind that he fooked her up the poo pipe cos her fanny stunk like a 90 year old tramp. Thus squaddie then gets told that if he marries her they will get a house and thus no longer be stuck in the block. Squaddie sees this as a good idea as he has a block inspection coming up and cant really be bothered. He spends the next 9 months in luxery getting drunk with his mates as per normal while the good missus sits at home smoking mayfair and drinking gin. Thus ruining any possible chances the child will have in its future life. Once the little cherub is born the squaddie realises his mistake as the little darling turns up with 6 toes and looks remarkably like a character from lord of the rings. It's at this point the lady announces that he cant leave because she's spent the last 9 months shopping on the internet buying junk in his name and he's now so much in debt he could not possibly afford a divorce.

Hope that clears a few things up for you
 
#7
Why post this in the Sigs forum?
Are you being serious, have you visited Blandfords patch recently! The quarters now have pyrex glass on all the mirrors. And I am sure some of those children have been raised/dragged up by wolves.

But any of you pads out there, please dont take it personally, I'm on about your next door neighbours not you.
 
#9
My mission in life is to find myself the perfect wife.

Successful applicants must be able to use a penknife and a compass.

She who dares wins.

Camouflage provided.
 
#10
Davros_the_Dalek said:
Bwahahahahahaha!!!!!


So true!!!! Singlies for life!!! :D
I was once a singlie, and have observed singlie behaviour for the last 10 years of married life (which hasnt changed one jot). I can say from, i like to think, a great deal of first hand experience to watching the behaviour of the single squaddie, that you are just as guilty of shagging the same chav scum that you berate us for marrying.

Where the fcuk do you think they come from? You dont spend your single life nesting a long line of beauties only to fall head over heels in love with some 22 stone, chain smoking, ron hill wearing freak of nature.

The moral of this is simple, if there is a problem with pads wives, its the fault of the singlie. You should be ashamed of yourselves

Boney
 
#11
Green Jacketes wives at Tidworth a few years ago Stiletoes and friggin Ron hills mmmm nice. Pad tracksuits grey wipmedowns and grey sweatshirts lovely

Enough Said

Tazman
 
#12
Suggestion: be less p*ssed when sh*gging and thus reduce risk of producing offspring with mingers who demand marriage or "bruvers" will break skull, thus avoid populating camps with monster-ladies.

:lol:
 
#13
No word of a lie, I once saw a pad's wife in Hildesheim with white high heels and ron hills with "Army Wives" printed down the legs! She was a total fecking horror, I wouldn't touch her with a lump hammer..
 
#14
I reckon they look lovely, and cheers to some of you guys out there who got sent on detachment while I was in cos I was up there like a rat up a drainpipe while drinking your beer and eating your food. I mean does it matter where you get your snake shook, its easier than doing the focker yourself!!! bring on the big mingers, all you have to do is shut your eyes and release the glue he heh
ps if there are any on here, do you fancy a reunion meet !
 
#16
I think Boney was in the right direction.

Squaddies hang out in pretty rough bars and places - so, by de-facto, what kind of girl do you get in there - dogs.

However, on most garrisons, you can see loads of the leggin' and t-shirt Bde, with a massive waistline and fag on the go, but then you see hubby and he is not actually Brad Pitt himself. To stereotype; normal dress is shaven head, a piss stained Arsenal Shirt, Capa trousers with nike trainers donned with chunky gold chain. Now to me, they make a couple and probably have similar interests such as going on crappy package holidays together or identifying with the dimwits in the Sky TV debt consolidation adverts.

So, its not just the wives, take a look at the squaddies as well....

Bull
 
#18
boneym you are just a bitter and twisted old fart that has got to a point in his marriage and realised that he cant keep up with the modern singly, face it mate, stop sittin on the fence and admit you wish you was back there!
 
#20
Thebull140 said:
It's at this point the lady announces that he cant leave because she's spent the last 9 months shopping on the internet buying junk in his name and he's now so much in debt he could not possibly afford a divorce.
Sad but true. I know loads of young toms who are in absolutely shedloads of debt and it's difficult to see a way out. The wierd thing is they have only been married about 6 months but have about 4 kids who are all of vastly different appearance. Chav blueprint?
 

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