I've just been on holiday for a week with my family comprising one wife and three bambinos. I've got to object to army indoctrination. We were having a nice game of tennis. My 5 year old had got the drop on me. He's a bit of a sports natural. I was toying with him for a while and then he started getting points when he shouldn't have. A bigger man would have laughed it off and said, "Look at the little feller go, isn't he something special". But no, not me. I started laying down 120 mph serves just to put him under a bit of pressure. My wife was saying, "Stop it Convoy (for it is my given name) your making a dick of yourself" But I couldn't help it. I ended up taking him to 5 sets and trouncing with him with an ace right at the death. As I ran round the court, big-timing for Britain, all my lad was saying was, "Daddy, can I have an ice-cream and PS I Hate you." I blame the Army for this. Prior to joining I was quite happy to let anybody beat me at any team or individual sport with my only response being a firm handshake and a willingness to do better next time. Them fcukers in the MOD have brainwashed me into contesting every utterly meaningless competition as if my life depended on it. Do any other NAAFI posters have an equally shameful desire to win????