Sporting legends immortalised in verse.

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by k13eod, Mar 17, 2010.

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  1. Poet laureate Carol Ann Duffy has penned a poem with the perhaps unusual inspiration of David Beckham's Achilles injury ...

    What the fcuk is that all about? I think mine is better ...

    Becks, Becks, Becks,
    You play your footy, wearing Vicky’s kecks.
    But now you’ve fucked your ankle up,
    You can’t play in the World Cup.
    But at least you can keep an eye on Posh,
    And that cunt Terry won’t get a nosh.

    Beat that fcuker!
  2. Becks, sorry to be overtly blunt,
    But you're an overpaid footballing homo chavvy fukwit cnut

  3. David Beckham wear footy sox
    While cumming in his wife's posh box
  4. There was a young scouser called Wayne,
    and when he saw a granny he came,
    The papers caught him shamed,
    and he thought Collette would blame,
    but he flashed his cash and she was tamed!
  5. David beckham is a cunt
    And his wife ia a cunt too.

    Done that non-rhyming poetry style.
  6. Oh Beckham your hopes are now dashed
    Now your ankle has been f*ckin smashed
    It really is a shame
    But we know who to blame
    That scawny, talentless dog who's seems to be sucking the life force out of you and choosing the most f*ckin ridiculous names for your kids and living off the fact that she was once in a sh*t pop group but is now married to a rich footballer, she should burn in hell after being skinned know who I mean, old whats'er name.
  7. That really is quite thought provoking.
  8. Manc fans on Park Ji-Sung (to the tune of 'Lord of the Dance'):

    'Park, Park, whoever you may be.
    You eat dogs in your own country.
    But it could be worse, you could be Scouse,
    Eating rats in your council house'.

    Fulham fans on Bobby Zamora (who's missed a few sitters in his time - to the tune of 'That's Amore'):

    'When you're sat in Row Z and the ball hits your head,
    That's Zamora'.
  9. Now look what you've done. You've sullied a poetry thread with common terrace chants.
  10. It's poetry, innit?

    Anyway, after last night the Zamora piss-take might be considered out of date.
  11. Biped

    Biped LE Book Reviewer

    Brought to mind a comment in another thread, so I'm attempting to invigorate your inner mental sanctums with my 'Ode to a Footballer'


    'Twas the World Cup in '86
    We fought against the Argies
    but this time on the pitch
    losing 2-1, ain't it a b!tch!

    There's no doubt about it,
    the greasy dego fouled
    got all religious, the sh!t
    when we got up and howled.

    Blamed 'The Hand of God'
    and was backed by the Pope
    to the hilt was his Squad
    We didn't have a hope.

    At last now, the truth can be seen,
    and it appears to go with the territory
    it wasn't footy, instead quite obsene
    God touching balls inapropriately.
  12. There once was a boxer call Hatton.
    Who's opponents he would flatton
    Till a challenger came
    and gave him some pain
    Now little Ricky's been shat on!!
  13. Sully away I say.

    It'll all end in tears.

    Or something based on a poem by Kipling. :)
  14. I seem to remember a slightly different version of that song everytime he did he the net when he played for BHAFC...mind you that was a fair few leagues below!
  15. A timeless classic from yesteryear:

    Cheer up, Terry V
    Oh, how can it be? You're a
    Sad Daggie bastard, with a
    Shite football te-ee-ee-eam!

    And he was.