Spoilt Brat needs a Slap please form an orderly queue

#2
Don't forget to leave some for "Sir" Elton John...in my dreams he stops at my checkpoint and asks "Don't you know who I am??" To which I reply variously, depending on my mood...

"No. Do you know who I am...no..then feck off you fat bald tw$t"

"Yes, didn't you used to be Benny Hill"

"Yes, third rate chanteur of the nineteen seventies who never did anything good after Yellow BricK Road..."

"Yes. Now get in the queue with the other civvies."
 
#3
Cuddles said:
Don't forget to leave some for "Sir" Elton John...in my dreams he stops at my checkpoint and asks "Don't you know who I am??" To which I reply variously, depending on my mood...

"No. Do you know who I am...no..then feck off you fat bald tw$t"

"Yes, didn't you used to be Benny Hill"

"Yes, third rate chanteur of the nineteen seventies who never did anything good after Yellow BricK Road..."

"Yes. Now get in the queue with the other civvies."
i will take door number three please BOB :p
 
#5
this makes no sense at all, i bloody love it.

and a basball bat upside your head works wonders for migraines, try it on your kids when tey next come crying of a headache. Puts em straight to sleep. :D
 

old_fat_and_hairy

LE
Book Reviewer
Reviews Editor
#6
Cuddles said:
Don't forget to leave some for "Sir" Elton John...in my dreams he stops at my checkpoint and asks "Don't you know who I am??" To which I reply variously, depending on my mood...

"No. Do you know who I am...no..then feck off you fat bald tw$t"

"Yes, didn't you used to be Benny Hill"

"Yes, third rate chanteur of the nineteen seventies who never did anything good after Yellow BricK Road..."

"Yes. Now get in the queue with the other civvies."
When I was a 17yr service bobby, on a cold and wet night, on foot patrol, I stopped a rather sporty car with a defective front light. The driver, on winding his window down, reluctantly, smirked at his vapid but gorgeous female companion. he looked at me with disdain, and said' Do you know who my father is?' I had to reply, 'No, but have you thought of asking your mother? She may recall his name'.

Even my Chief Super saw the humour when he called me in for a bollocking, he didn't like the Mayor, either.
 
#7
everybody huuurts sometimes, haha, if i was that girls mother i would cancel the party, to right though baseball bat to the head :threaten:
 
#8
andyboy443 said:
everybody huuurts sometimes, haha, if i was that girls mother i would cancel the party, to right though baseball bat to the head :threaten:
Alas her mother probably had a lot to do with the brat's reaction - at least she apologised for her daughter's behaviour but then no doubt took the child home and grounded her for a whole day... oooooh!
 

engr172

Old-Salt
Book Reviewer
#9
Just kick the little tawt right in the cnut.....pathetic
 
#10
Kids, eh? Can't live with 'em, can't be certain you've got rid of all the forensic.
 
#15
whatnow? said:
:x

that beach needs hanging by her feet and the soles slapped with a bamboo cane till she bleeds
That's a second date in some parts.

Mainly where I live, to be honest, but still....
 
#16
I wonder how far I would have got if I curse my parents like that? I suppose I would have to learn to live without kneecaps and a sharp indent to the head.

If that was my child, I would had driven off without the spoilt cow and suddenly develop amnesia until she apologised and realised how lucky she was to get such a gift.
 
#17
IMO, the fact that the parent(s) even seriously contemplated such a "gift" tells us all we need to know about the nature of the "problem"!

Same principle (on a vastly greater scale!) as the "hair cut principle": new Year 7 (ie 11 year old) pupil arriving in school sporting expensive/ "trendy" hair style = trouble. Why? Because any parent daft enough to indulge an 11 year old in this way has long since lost the plot, and you have an egocentric brat on your hands.
 

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